
i think i get so uncomfortable because usually the rape in yaoi are not talked about or simply brushed as "he says no but his body says yes". but here, the rape is clear, there's witness, and there's a conversation about it talking about the repercussion for the rapist. it gets real there, and kyo seems so... detached from reality because who responds like that to his own rapist? the characters all act so one-dimensionally, it's like common sense doesn't apply to them

seme is insufferable af. i understand not liking talking to a lot of people because you're shy or introverted. but he thinks of people as beneath him when the true superficial person is him. how egoistical of him to think uke will always put him first as if uke doesn't have a life outside their friendship. i know he changes his attitude with an ulterior motive but i hope he'll truly learn a lesson of humbling himself and finding out people really aren't always the worst like he thinks they are
the novel truly amplified the emotions conveyed 1000x, including the mortifying secondhand embarrassment i felt when i had to read the moment ting realises he's been badmouthing his prof to the man himself lol
The whole time I was reading I was either cringing or laughing.