"You're so cool Tanner"
"I'm not a Kissboy"
Me and this site are lovers they just don't know it yet
Going on 9 years we married
So seeing his backstory at first made me sympathize with him. Like he went through truly horrendous shit and never deserved that, but then it kept going. We see him build her up in his mind to give him something to live for, and it's frankly really scary to see. Like I'm a fan of possessive MLs in mangas, but his felt different and at first I couldn't tell why. But then we see him finally meet her, and his world comes crashing down as he realized his delusion was never real. And instead of blaming her father or the environment he was raised in or even himself for creating a fictional person who no real person could ever live up to, he chose to blame her, make her a villain for deceiving him despite her never knowing him or giving him any indication that he should feel hope and love from her.
It was at this point I realized why this made me so uncomfortable and its because it is just like those real life stories where an obsessive fan meets their idol, they dont live up to this ideal person they created in their head who is meant to love them, and then they snap and kill this celebrity. It has happened to women so often in real life, even to just normal women with their stalkers, and seeing it here was honest to god terrifying, especially knowing that that story was given to us to make us like him and justify his actions when really all it should make you feel if you analyze his story from outside of his perspective, is terror.
He is a victim of his environment and his horrible childhood, but he is now a full grown adult and responsible for his actions and how they affect others. Because of this, I can confidently say that no matter how he tries to justify this to himself or how the author tries to redeem him, I cannot view him as anything but a monster, an irrideamable villain. If the story was not about them getting back together, I could possibly see a path to redemption, but with how this story is heading I feel quite disgusted that his feeling of betrayal over her supposed actions will be viewed as justifiable by the narrative when they are anything but. The woman he created in his mind never existed and never can exist, and even if he realizes that and comes to love Annette for who she truly is, he will never deserve someone like her. I think it sends a horrible message to make them get together because the narrative is saying real victims who were killed or driven to death by fans or stalkers who built them up in their head only to realize they were wrong and then dedicate themselves to tearing them down are justified in what they did.
I know some might say I'm overreacting here but stories have a purpose, and the message given in them matters, especially in stories where you are going for redemption. I think this story is beautifully written, and the art is gorgeous, but knowing where this is heading makes me quite disappointed. These two will never be good for each other. Annette can never be the image he has built around her as a saint which we have already seen fall apart once, and he can never be the person she loves because that person never truly existed. She doesn't know who he truly is and neither does he know her, but unlike Annette who is willing to get to know his true self, he would rather live in delusion, and even if one day he chooses to find the truth, it should already be too late, even if the narrative will say otherwise. Annette at the end of the day is a victim. She is a victim of her family, her country, her sheltered upbringing, and especially her husband. That does not make her innocent in her complicity to atrocities, but when she lives in a world where her role as a woman was to never ask questions and just be pretty, it is hard to escape that reality. Yes she was privileged, but that does not make her evil, especially given that she quickly tried to become better, and yet those around her would not let her, instead wanting her to remain ignorant so that they could continue to hate her.
No matter what we see of Heiner's backstory, as a full grown adult Heiner has become the type of person he hated, the person who abused him his whole life, turning that abuse towards Annette, an innocent at the end of the day. He has made her carry the sins of her father, when in reality, he is the one carrying her fathers sins and legacy. I probably will continue to read this because I think the writing is good and the art is beautiful, but I want to be cognoscenti of the fact that this story that wants to send a message is sending the wrong one, and when a story wants to do that, you cannot just ignore the message it is sending to look at the pretty pictures. Critique is so important for stories like this that deal with such heavy topics, and future stories can only improve when people are aware of what dissonance was in previously similar stories. Redemption arcs can be beautiful, tragic backstories have their place, and emphasizing with a character that did bad things is not wrong, but using all of these together to justify setting up the two main leads again because you think they look good together is a recipe for disaster in a real relationship, which again matters in this case given the story is trying to send a message about relationships and abuse.
I know no one will probably read all of this, but I had to get this off my chest because this story gave me so many things to think about. At the end of the day, these two characters are tragic and beautiful in their own ways, but they do not belong together, not now, not ever, and no redemption arc could make their broken relationship work.
At this point, his face gonna be plastered on a Wanted Poster.
Hey!! So js came back after reading the novel and...I so hope every single person who hurt my poor girl Edith rots. Chapter 124 is NOT for the weak. I repeat. (Novel)
LMFAO y’all r so annoying w the “why post if you can’t translate right” and you realize the ppl translating these chapters are trying their best if you don’t fucking like it THEN leave.. ungrateful ahh pieces of turds. y’all gotta remember that THIS is an illegal website with unofficial translations unless official translations r posted. And before saying “the translator is immature bc they can’t take criticism” you’re obviously wrong because some of yall aren’t even criticizing yall r just STRAIGHT up cussing them out “But this ass uploader act all mighty saviour by saying ppl asked him to do so... Shit! Just some attention seeker” like it’s never that serious