icry's Topics (179)

that was definitely not the plan

completely forgot this had smut holy shit

bro foreshadowed

lmao I love how mirye's contact name on his mom's phone is "first born"

Ian's mother is frustrating. She's difficult and stubborn. When Ian confronted her—opting her for them to talk—she felt the need to be defensive as if his criticism threatens her fragile sense of self. She starts acting as if her son's moral actions are a direct extension or reflection of her own virtue.The fight that follows likely stems from her defensiveness and inability to see beyond her constructed role.

I'm not sure if she's worse before or now. When her husband died, she completely became unable because of grief—falling into an unhealthy coping mechanism which is alcoholism (be noted that I am not saying she isn't allowed to grieve). Ian felt responsible for her. If you put it in that way, considering their situation then, Ian lost two of his parents.

But when Ian gained recognition for his good deeds, you know, being known as some "angel" boy and whatever—she eventually fixed herself. She relied on this image. However, instead of a healthy internal transformation, her identity started revolving around it. This is the turning point where her recovery turned into a problematic turn.

I do hope that in the end of the series or at least in future chapters, she talks everything with Ian and eventually get the help she needs. Right now, the concept of her getting help seems unlikely. After all, you can't help someone who won't help themself.

holy shit

losers

bro was a nightmare and he didn't even know it

their situationship is driving me insane

Personally, I think for Ian, t's either he moves on and start a new life as a new person somewhere out there or he needs to choose between Tj and Joseph—considering they're the two leads in his life. If I get to choose, I genuinely think Joseph would be better for him. What he and Tj has is toxic codependency—basically they're entire trope is "you're all I have" and "I'm the only one who understands you"—which by the way, has been pretty much shown and proven!

Though I don't doubt what they feel and have for each other, a toxic codependent relationship becomes emotionally or mentally damaging to both parties, yet they feel unable to separate (which is pretty much shown if you've read Ian and TJ's internal and external monologues); and taking into account how Tj is reluctant—or at least—pretty much unwilling of letting Ian go. And to add, I like to think he views Joseph as "competition" or along those lines. To mention, Tj was very confident at first, since he knows Ian would come back to him each and everytime. I forgot what chapter it was, but, Tj was thinking how Joseph was very different from them—basically saying sometime soon he'll leave Ian too and just like everytime—Tj will be the only one to stay. Well, this was crushed, seeing how Joseph is quite persistent and considering Ian's making moves to seperate.

And I'm not sure I'm the only who first thought of codependency when I first saw Ian and TJ's dynamic. They have a long history with each other, and they've been supporting each other since before. The love they have becomes entangled with dependency, guilt, fear, and identity, making it hard to distinguish affection from need. They feel like they’re incomplete without the other; individual identities start to dissolve. When one hurts, the other suffers disproportionately—but instead of healthy empathy, it turns into mutual suffocation.


Of course, whatever happens to the story and characters is ultimately up to the author. Therefore, I could be horribly wrong with my statements and opinions. And considering I haven't caught up, as I'm only 32 chapters in, things could very much change. Which, if it does, I'll point and laugh at myself like the clown that I am for being wrong.

If Ian ends up choosing Tj, I hope they heal each other and be the happiest this time

Also this shit is peak. Read it.