I read this chapter two times because it's just too sweet <33 Maybe this is what you call blind love? "I didn't care who she was or what kind of life she'd lived until then" was so genuine, I think falling in love with someone could really be about that... I didn't think Klaus would fall in love at first sight. It was so unexpected, it almost feels magical, and that all makes it so sweet :)) Klaus really didn't judge Anton's mother but appreciated her, and I could see that his eyes just brightens up around her.(⌒▽⌒)
I fell in love with the way Anton's parents kissed each other! LOOK AT THAT! They made eye-contact and Klaus had his thumb on her cheek. It was so sweet when Anton's parents were on the grass, as his head was on her lap and she leaned down to kiss him. You could just see Klaus bathed with her love and he only had his attention on her too.
I believe Klaus when he reflected, "In that instant, my world turned upside down." Klaus was so bored, being used to all his privileges, I think Anton's mother brought this ray of sunshine to his life. :)
(Klaus was only 20 when he fell in love and it was during the summer... xD Should I be jealous of young love??)
We could see how serious Klaus was of his love, since they even married without an audience. It seems no one was invited since upper-class folks would definitely be against their marriage. One rich person said Klaus was "already engaged to a proper young lady," so there may have been tension in Klaus's family when he broke off that engagement to marry the love of his life... :/ It would have been worse if Klaus's engagement was supposed to be a political marriage and if that somehow affected his family business...
Now, the foreshadowing is spooky... Klaus reflected, "Not even she herself could have anticipated what was to come" and "I believed wholeheartedly that things would go my way, as always. I had no reason to suspect otherwise" really demonstrates that whatever happened afterwards was not in Klaus's control or prediction.
I feel a little iffy about their wedding ceremony and Anton's mother being introduced at the end... I'm curious if she was able to live the life she wanted. At least in terms of clothing, we don't see her expressing her culture at both the wedding and the introduction. I understand dressing in a more westernized way at the announcement, but even at her own wedding... :/ And I get the feeling that both looked a bit more concerned than overjoyed to marry each other...
This chapter gave off a very bittersweet feeling. You're in love but society isn't always approving of it >< Maybe whatever happened to Anton’s mother is the reason why Klaus is unsupportive of Anton and Arwin’s love… Maybe Klaus just doesn’t want Anton to walk down the same path? :/
LOL!! I'm not a male so I could never qualify to work at Shangri-La, but I WANT TO BE THERE!! HOLY SMOKES, I'd cuddle up to Apollo!! Look at that hot body!! (⌒▽⌒) All of Zariya's men are too gorgeous (▰˘◡˘▰)
I love how serious Apollo is. <3 The man's got his heart on his sleeve once he has eyes for only one person. I am curious about the history behind his ex... Maybe that lawyer came to the island to settle divorce papers...? I think Apollo's previous relationship is at least, partially why Apollo must pay off whatever it is he needs to.
I seriously think Apollo is a cutie. I'm really looking forward to Apollo and Phi eventually falling in love!
I am curious if Phi was really joking about him murdering someone before, but I guess that will be addressed eventually! :)
I don't know a lot about the characters yet, but I think Studio Stellas does a great job at portraying the emotions!! I was so touched to see Arwin comfort Anton as they're both alike in not knowing a lot about their background, and when they had sex, THAT was lovemaking! There was such a warm feeling to see Anton and Arwin cuddle in bed, and for Arwin to tell Anton that Klaus must have loved Anton's mother because he refuses to remarry. Even before the sex, it was heartwarming when Arwin said, "...feeling your body heat and heartbeat against my fingertips makes me happy. Such warmth...reminds me that we are both alive. Isn't that enough?" <33 We could just feel that Anton and Arwin are so grateful to meet each other and know the other party loves them :)
That flashback of Anton's mother by the flowers and then running to Klaus as they embraced and kissed... They loved each other very much <33 I think Klaus is a jerk now because he was hurt by love... We don't know what happened; as much as Klaus may 'despise' Anton's mother, he still loves her dearly, since he has an empty room and her portrait to remember her.... :/ That monologue, "Same as it ever was...I remain powerless to refuse your smile” was tragic ╥﹏╥
Now, I was heartbroken when Anton ran to Arwin's room and saw Klaus having sex with Arwin. Clearly, that was not lovemaking; blindfolding Arwin and the one-sided effort during penetration was disturbing. Poor Arwin was being used as a tool to punish Anton for defying Klaus, and I think even Arwin himself for not knowing his place.... :/ Klaus was losing power in that moment when Arwin said, "Anton... Anton? Mr. Arnault! It's Anton... He's..." Poor Anton couldn't do anything because he's powerless against Klaus... I'm curious about what Klaus's reason is for refusing to help Anton get Arwin out of the Cyrene Salon...? Klaus didn't even flinch when Anton went on his knees, cried, and begged Klaus to help... :/
Maybe Anton is somehow a mirror of how Klaus used to be...? Anton so desperately wants to live peacefully with Arwin, but thank goodness Arwin was practical enough to realize that such a life (running away) won't be perfect. I like that Anton saw through Arwin's lies when our prostitute lied about not wanting to live in squalor.
Now, I'm curious about Nick and Heath's relationship... I don't know if Nick desired to have sex with Cyrene, but I get the impression that Nick did so because Cyrene wanted to... Why does Nick refuse Heath's advances? Does Heath have romantic feelings for Nick? How does Cyrene benefit by telling Klaus about Arwin and Anton's relationship?
SO MUCH mystery!!
Yay that Taeyoung knows Mr. Joo talked to our precious model on his own, without Min-ki's knowledge. I'm curious to see how Taeyoung would respond if Min-ki apologizes for acting on his own while drunk :))
TAEYOUNG GETTING HARD WAS SOO CUTE!! xDD OMG, that must have been awkward for Taeyoung, but so nice of Min-ki to lie by saying our experienced actor bit our model's tongue :P
I like that Taeyoung and Min-ki could face each other more comfortably. :)) It would be nice if their teen drama had a live adaptation xDD
I found out chapter 52 was the end. I recapped the story for myself as I skimmed and read the ending... Please clarify if you can. :)
So, Heejae paid Dohyeon to visit Jisuh, so Heejae could pick up Jisuh in chapter 14 and control or manipulate Jisuh emotionally. Maybe I missed it, but besides Dohyeon going to Heejae's apartment with Jisuh to piss off Heejae, what was Dohyeon's role in Jisuh's revenge plan? Besides Jisuh and Dohyeon going to the hotel to chat, and then Heejae picking up Jisuh in the driveway…how did Jisuh realize Heejae was doing background checks? How much did Sun-yool know about Heejae’s background checks on Jisuh and paying Dohyeon to revisit Jisuh?
Jisuh wanted to gather any evidence to destroy Heejae, like Heejae's career. Not finding Heejae and Sun-yool's sex videos, Jisuh tried to record Heejae verbally about the sex tapes. But Jisuh ran away from Heejae. During their relationship, Heejae genuinely fell in love with Jisuh but continued doing background checks. <- Correct me if anything was wrong here
I like that Sun-yool worked towards his graduation and acted in theater. Bravo!! I'm glad to see Sun-yool's growth as he was passionate about acting and was accepting of him and Jisuh being friends. It doesn't seem Sun-yool continued to have romantic feelings for Jisuh in the end.
Now...this story really took a direction I never expected when it was first published on Lezhin LOL. I think many of us were curious or decided to read because of the threesome, and even BDSM. White Eared said she was rooting for Sun-yool, so I think many of us assumed she meant it romantically...
I’m unsure about Jisuh and Heejae's relationship. They did receive comfort beyond the bedroom, such as those moments when they cuddled and talked about work. Heejae seems genuine about wanting to change. Jisuh missed Heejae too... Maybe they will do better now that they're back together?? (Would they engage in BDSM? x))
I hope the epilogue includes Sun-yool. Maybe Sun-yool will find a new love interest??
I just feel like this story ended so suddenly when there could have been more somehow... More BDSM or threesome explorations, for example. Heejae and Jisuh could have had a more in-depth discussion about what they want from their relationship too, or else they could repeat any past mistakes now that they're back together :/
I'm somewhat curious as to why Sun-yool was created in this story...? I felt like Sun-yool was put aside in the 'game' that Heejae started to control Jisuh, after Jisuh rejected Sun-yool... Yes, it's lovely Sun-yool grew up, but... I wanted more screen time for him?? ._____. Am I the only one who feels this way??
(╯°Д °)╯╧╧ IT'S HERE!! I've been staring at the raws for the longest time (33 chapters now), and I'm so grateful it's translated!! Love the BDSM! Sex toys! WOO HOO!!
As of six chapters (chapters 5 and 6 could be found here https://miloindies.wixsite.com/sutekisteak), it seems Tae-young is still attached to Jae-young. I don't know if they live in a small area or if it really is that coincidental that Tae-young and Jae-young are now renting apartments at the same building?? Very coincidental that they're only one floor apart too.... :/
It seems Jae-young isn't fond of how clingy Tae-young is. I hope Tae-young doesn't control Jae-young without the elder's consent. I'm still unsure if what we saw at the beginning of the story was what Jae-young wanted...
It seems Jae-young and Ji-Kwon seem to communicate well and their BDSM relationship seems to make both parties satisfied. Well done!! It was too hot when Jae-young and Ji-Kwon were in the car, and Ji-Kwon wanted to reward Jae-young for giving the seme a satisfying blowjob, so Ji-Kwon surprised Jae-young with the sex toy. I think it's nice when the s could surprise and satisfy the m like that :)) I want to see more Ji-Kwon and Jae-young interactions!!
WAS I THE ONLY ONE WHO GOT MIXED UP BETWEEN TAE-YOUNG AND JAE-YOUNG IN THE FIRST 2 CHAPTERS? LOL!! I only knew Jae-young's name when he went to work, and people greeted him :P
Who was it that thought “Don’t say it” during the phone conversation (pages 29, 34, and 36)? I could interpret that as YuYang hoping deep down for LiHuan to not say anything that YuYang can’t reply to, or it could be LiHuan hoping YuYang wouldn’t say anything LiHuan himself sees as untrue…
But DAMN!! LIHUAN!! Where could I find someone like you?? ε=ε=(ノ≧∇≦)ノ I love how NATURAL their conversation felt!! “I like you. From all the people that I’ve met… you are the loveliest one. I really like you”!! GENUINE and STRAIGHTFORWARD!! YES!! <3
It’s so touching when you meet someone who appreciates and loves you for who you are. Not that we constantly need someone to validate us, but it is a very warm feeling when someone tells you that :) I love that LiHuan put his heart on his sleeve in this phone call. I love it when people demonstrate that they care for you through their actions, not just with words alone.
I feel that with folks like YuYang (I’ll include myself too LOL) could be smiling around others, but it is very true that people don’t always necessarily know what is happening with you. I resonated with YuYang when he said, “Actually no one really understands,” and “It’s very difficult for people to truly understand each other.” You could use all the words you know, from the bottom of your heart to explain something to someone, and they still wouldn’t understand. Some folks only understand if they have been in your situation before, while others refuse to understand.
You could be like YuYang where you could go to places, like school, and have folks near you – never worried about who will be in your class or who you’ll walk home with after class, but it doesn’t necessarily mean you have connections that run deep in your heart. It’s much easier to meet folks who you could enjoy your time with, and it tends to be easier to defend yourself than rely on others to do so. YuYang grew up defending himself because he recognized no one in his family would, and he was forced to accept that people with homophobic views will always exist. You could feel so lonely in these moments, even if it isn’t so difficult to find activities that bring a smile to your face.
I appreciate that YuYang is safe to open his heart to LiHuan. Right now, YuYang still has his heart guarded but the fact that LiHuan chose to call YuYang… That’s a significant indicator that LiHuan cares. :) LiHuan not only wants to communicate with YuYang, but our younger boy also wants to hear the emotion in YuYang’s voice and feel that much closer to our precious uke <3 That reminds me of chapter 25 when LiHuan knocked on YuYang’s door to ask in-person what time they would go swimming the following day <33 I love how direct LiHuan is in that sense; when LiHuan wants to do something, he just does it. :) No ambiguity whatsoever! YuYang even asked, “You could have just sent me a message! Why trouble yourself coming all the way down here…”, which I really like :) I love it when people make the effort to see you because they want to. X))
I also think it is very true when you don’t realize someone has romantic feelings for you LOL!! XD I’m like YuYang where I get surprised by people’s honest answers about them liking me (could be as a person in general, as a friend…). I loved seeing the surprise on YuYang’s face when LiHuan admitted that our seme would run to our uke if YuYang was at their university, and it was clear LiHuan was disappointed that he couldn’t fly to YuYang in Beijing. I love that LiHuan even asked where YuYang lives, even though it was already nighttime!! <33
I like that DJun doesn’t portray YuYang as someone who gets happy by the littlest gestures, like LiHuan calling or saying LiHuan will go see YuYang. YuYang has been through so much; anyone would feel tired emotionally if they still face homophobic remarks for years, and YuYang has an unrequited love for Lin Xiang… It’s no wonder that YuYang believes no one likes him back since his family cannot love (accept) YuYang for who he is (including that he’s gay), and Lin Xiang loves Xiao Guang. If I were in YuYang’s position, I would just feel so done.
I acknowledge that LiHuan’s confession may not have appeared at the most appropriate time, since YuYang just had a fight with his parents, but when else would LiHuan confess? LiHuan killed two birds with one stone through his confession: had YuYang see that our uke is indeed loved for who he is, and LiHuan expressed his feelings. LiHuan being transparent now is better than seeing LiHuan love YuYang but not realize his feelings are romantic LOL.
Now, I’m curious… What will YuYang say to LiHuan’s “The kiss that night… You still remember, don’t you?” I want YuYang and LiHuan to have an honest conversation about the kiss and LiHuan’s confession overall, but I’m unsure if YuYang is in the right state of mind for that… YuYang may need more time to himself after that fight with his parents :/
Anyway, it’s already 3:20 AM LOL. I technically read this five days ago after a long day at my school placement. Love that I could reread this chapter and appreciate this story so much <33
it was yuyang thinking to himself, basically him telling himself not to say anything anymore, to just shut up
Thank you for the clarification! :) I was leaning more towards YuYang thinking "Don't say it" too, since LiHuan doesn't seem like the type of person to intentionally tell himself to hold back very much.
I think YuYang is used to shouldering how he feels, like the homophobic remarks from his family and people at school, and his unrequited love for Lin Xiang. LiHuan may be the first person YuYang sincerely talked to about his feelings for Lin Xiang, and now the fight YuYang had with his parents and dealing with homophobia in general. So, it seems YuYang is used to not talking about how he feels very much, yet there was a part of him that needed to talk about how he feels. When you're on the phone, I notice that people tend to be more honest or reveal more at nighttime than during the day.
YuYang probably doesn't have a heart-to-heart soulmate he talks with about his feelings, since like he said, “It’s very difficult for people to truly understand each other.” I could relate to that since I don't talk about my feelings too much with many people, since I don't have the confidence that they would understand all the time.
I agree that it’s difficult for people to understand each other, which could be very lonely. We could have so much self-love, but we can’t deny how lonely it is when you feel people don’t truly understand you. Maybe it's about learning to take baby steps in what we share with others, and we could feel less lonely that way. We could think no one understands, but there still could be people who will if we just give them the chance.
Uh, no girl it was Lihuan LOOOOL. Cause yuyang always tells him stuff like "you won't understand" which is a personal insult to him
Haha, wow! I didn't think I would get two different answers. :P "Don't say it" could be interpreted differently, huh?
I skimmed through the chapter again, and I could see LiHuan thinking "Don't say it," not only to YuYang creating that distance between them by asserting our younger boy doesn't understand our older boy, but it could also be LiHuan unconsciously telling himself not to say whatever he thinks he shouldn't. Ultimately, LiHuan chose to confess to YuYang, even though he originally wasn't intending to do so when he called YuYang.
We can just say that both of them said it xD
Haha, I like your answer too! :D YuYang could be telling himself to not reveal too much since he doesn't think LiHuan would understand our uke, while LiHuan could be telling himself to not say whatever our seme thinks shouldn't be said. So, in the end, both parties were telling themselves to hold back, but they didn't. :) How sweet is that? They're a compatible pair <3
No, those were YuYang's thoughts. DJun confirmed it when someone asked him, so it was exactly what LiiQ said :)
I appreciate reading the original posters' thoughts about YuYang guarding his own feelings and watching what he is saying, and what it could mean to finally find someone who is open and who tells him he likes him. It was lovely to read! I was very confused by this but when I re-read it I saw that the "don't say it" was always on the picture with YuYang, its symtomatic of him having to hold his overflowing upset over his fight with his parents inside, I see that now.
It sounds like you're talking about my posts, so thank you for saying they're lovely to read! I'm glad you enjoyed reading this thread. :) And I appreciate that this story portrays males as people who have emotions. At my placement, I hear remarks that paint males as people who are emotionally incapable. I know Here U Are is fictional, but it feels real and I'm sure it is a story many readers can relate to in some way or another. One common example would be the tension between parents and their children, which readers have commented, occurred to them.
Reading your comment again -and this thread- reminded me how important it is to communicate. It's really lonely to have no one to talk with when you're feeling down... :( We can see that YuYang's friends in the dorm are people he can smile and have fun with, but they don't seem like people he has incredibly deep friendships with. YuYang and LiHuan appear to be complete opposites, but wow! This story really reinforces how important it is to have a good listener in your life. (Must be even better if your lover is a good listener! X))
Once YuYang and LiHuan start dating, I'll be happy to see that YuYang won't be alone with his thoughts anymore! :D And haha, can you imagine LiHuan's dad meeting YuYang, and knowing YuYang is the person LiHuan kissed and wants to hold? xD
I did not finish Phantom because I don't want my heart to be broken (yet) so no spoilers there BUT I'VE GOT MIXED FEELINGS THAT I WANT TO LET OUT!! Diego and Callo joy but mixed feels for ma baby Misha and darling Gian
I know it's been years since Ilya passed away, and I did enjoy Therapist when I read it (first I read in the collection) BUT...BUT.... I STILL MISS ILYA!!! I'm not used to seeing Misha as an S now LOL!! XDD Very happy that Gian is moving forward as he's no longer living in the sadness of losing the relationship he had with his ex-wife, and ma boy Misha is independent... BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS, I FEEL EMPTY!! I feel like I haven't seen that in-between phase yet where Misha and Gian got to know each other .______. LIke I know Misha knows about how Gian felt about his ex-wife, and maybe Gian knows about Ilya already... BUT LIKe do they have anything in common (minus BDSM)?? I feel distant from the boys somehow, and I hope I have a better understanding of their characters in future chapters.
I wasn't too in love with chapter 80 tbh LOL because I low-key had higher expectations. I saw a bit of the raws for Callo and Diego a long time ago and was hella confused to see Diego and Callo at a police station. LOL, TO THINk these boys were role-playing rape in an alleyway, omg!! XD RIP to the grapes <333 Love that Callo and Diego could talk :)) It was VERY cool of Callo to ease Diego's feels by getting our pharmacist a ring with Callo's name on it <33
DIEGO, YOU CUTIE!! It was adorable when he kept talking about his ring and even took a photo for Misha to see LOL!!! XDD
But damn.... Diego's undergrad life sounds wild :P I'm an undergrad too. Your studies could consume so much of your time! I'd be paranoid of contracting STDs if I was having drunk sex (when you're drunk, protection isn't always #1 in your head) LOL!! I'm amazed that Diego had so much time to do all that :O and here I am, behind a screen, reading BL XDD
I just hope that these side chapters don't make me like the characters any less or lower my engagement ><
What a lovely chapter to start my day!! DJun's Q&A in chapter 51.2 was fun, and I wasn't upset about not having a chapter update before. If we got another hiatus message, I honestly wouldn’t have minded!
I just love that LiHuan admitted to his dad that he kissed YuYang!! ;P Ahaha! The feelings you have, like wanting to know what that person is doing, wanting to make them happy, wanting to know them better... How pure ヾ(❀╹◡╹)ﾉ~ LiHuan called YuYang because our seme wanted to know how our uke is doing. But it seems YuYang accidentally pressed video call... I'm curious to see what LiHuan's reaction would be to see those tears on YuYang's cheeks! I'd love to see LiHuan and his dad play basketball more often <33
Now, I hope LiHuan's dad is supportive of our seme loving a male... LiHuan's dad expressed his and his wife's concern, "Being such a lonely person like that, what if you could never find yourself a wife?" >< I hope LiHuan's dad won't pressure him to marry a female...
another nice empty chapter.
WHY DID I DECIDE TO FINISH THIS STORY PAST 12 AM?? OMG, I had so many TEARY MOMENTS!! Safu being an illusion, Shion almost losing Nezumi.... DAMN, my fujoshi heart was so happy just to see Nezumi and Shion sleeping on the same bed in the last chapter, but OMFG! Nezumi just had to go!! X((( And that kiss was SO bittersweet!! </3
My eyes were getting teary and then I felt like screaming and I had to calm down to continue reading... OMG. Shion even asked Nezumi, "Can I not leave with you?" even though the boy just reunited with his mother!! Shion wanted to be with Nezumi, instead of prioritizing spending time with his mom or developing No. 6. These two are IN LOVE!! ╥﹏╥ Although, I love that Nezumi wanted Shion to live the life our young white-haired boy should live for himself, and that's love too...
Do they not have cellphones??? Can't the boys at least call each other and say I love you on Valentine's Day?? （/TДT)/
I love that the ending didn't exclude anyone! Love that Dogkeeper is having fun raising little Shion :)) And Karen continues with her bakery.
... Okay, maybe this is a selfish wish.... I am happy that No. 6 is developing and folks aren't being brainwashed like before, but part of me is somewhat wishing that time could just stand still, you know? I already miss those days when Shion and Nezumi would hang out in THEIR room (Shion sees that room as home!!) filled with books and rats.... :'(( What happened to that room now that Shion is developing No. 6 and Nezumi is travelling??