afroluv's Favorite

Somebody please tell Yashiro that yes, it happened, he really did fell in love again after all these years.
His past conversation with Kageyama asking him how it is to sleep with only one person ( meaning how does it feel to be in a committed relationship)
His past conversation with Doumeki asking him how does it feel to fall in love with someone ( his analogy that for him it was painful like reaping a bandage on an open wound)
His current conversation with Kageyama asking him why he chose Kuga and not him ( meaning how do you know you love X and not Z, how do you know someone is the one? )
All these are poking around are about the same question Yashiro is trying to answer: Is this new feeling really love? Did really happened to me at this point of his life? And can I really be in normal relationship with someone?
Yashiro's love for Kageyama is not much of reference, he was young when he fell in love for the first time and it was barren, never tested beyond fantasy, never tested , or tested for routine of life together, never tested with intimacy nor fidelity. Mostly never tested before against a new stronger love.
So he is going around asking these questions to the people he knows have fallen in love in normal way... Doumeki, Kageyama. Truly he is just as inexperienced as a teenager falling in love once again and this time it involves someone loving him back so it's new and he is still dumbfounded that he got himself in this situation.

Where to begin...OK so obviously Yashiro had Doumeki drive him to the warehouse but he did it in such a way where Hirata wouldn't see them together. He tried to continue the verbal abuse from the last chapter by saying D was rough with the sex....D has a fear that he's a sex maniac like his dad so that jibe hit home. But then he moves from lying on that damn tire to lying on Ds lap. He rips that bandage off Ds face and says that is what falling in love feels like to him--like a painful, burning, bleeding wound... damn, my poor uke... He tries to pull out of D his reason for falling in love with him in a roundabout way but that didn't work. Then he makes D recall his adoptive sister's feelings for him. This is the part that confuses me because Yashiro is thinking that D saved his sister from that last rape but Yashiro himself was never saved..(why is he thinking of this now? Is this foreshadowing on his need to be saved or not from his current evil "parent"?). he says that your sister was lucky to have you. I think D interprets that as him saying it's good that his sister fell in love with him and he is touched. Truly I have never seen D so expressive as I have in this chapter.
So Yashiro's is moved to violence to keep D away from Hirata. D is so cute here because he basically tells him that his life belongs to him and he can do with it what he will ... my seme cinnamon roll...Yashiro gives him a flesh wound on his thigh and then we're supposed to believe that he shot him in the head? please! If he really wanted to hurt him he would have capped his knee not grazed his leg.,,my theory on the second bang is that he took a shot near D's ear in order to shock him or knock him out from the noise so close to his eardrum and went on to his meeting. I got to say I'm just disappointed as Chestnut and company on how he's dealing with Hirata so far but I see that he's got his right hand in his pocket likely still holding his gun on Hirata so that has some possibilities.
One thing is for sure the safest place for him to be is with his "parent" if the Gouda group finds him since it's this parent that put the blame on him for the killings. Speaking of ---maybe that is not a gun in his pocket maybe he has a cell phone on record and he plans on getting Hirata's guard down and admitting to the killings...? Or better yet a live feed to that board meeting in progress?

Yashiro's philosophy on life, part 1: Life is just one tragedy after another...Sareda Naki mor...Sareda Naki mo Sezu (the high school prequel)

Yashiro's philosophy on life part 2: I have lived my life accepting it all. I've felt no sorrow. I've blamed no one. I came to know the loneliness of loving someone and also the despair of that person being a man.
(Love?) I've known enough already. Vol 2 c8

Yashiro's philosophy on people:
People are full of contradictions...First they want to top. Then they want to bottom. They want to torture. Then they want to be tortured. People are full of contradictions..
They're lonely and then they're not. They're missed. And then they're not....Sareda Naki mo Sezu (the high school prequel story)

I purposefully left out his thoughts on masochism because Doumeki obliterated them in chpts 21-24. "If it doesn't hurt, I don't feel anything at all."

You guys basically wouldn't fall for a guy right? The only reason you'd stick it in a man is to satisfy your sexual urges. After all you have a reputation to uphold, that's why you look down on me and abuse me talk dirty to insult me as if you're trying to kill me with your anger while desperately moving your hips. It's irresistible.

Misumi's response: That hatred for humans could run so deep..it's kind of refreshing. Vol 2 C10

Yasiro's thoughts: The young boss Hirata. He is seriously the king of homophobes. To Misumi-San who left me in the care of this man, I'll be forever grateful. (Was he being sarcastic or masochistic or both with that?)

If you were to ask me what qualities a Yakuza needs to have, my answer would probably be: 1 make your boss money 2 have the drive to make money 3 have a respectable appearance 4 have ambition to power.

However, even if you don't have these things, you can get used to being in the Yakuza. Anyone can at least for a while. Volume 3 chapter 14.

2.
The idea that to lose is to win does not exist in the Yakuza way of thought. If you can't pay attention to common ground once you've commenced hostilities, it's only self-destructive in the end.

It's common becoming a Yakuza on the spur of the moment. And there are no good or bad reasons for it. It's only getting out that takes effort. Like a fine pussy sucking you deep inside. Volume 1 chapter 2

Has Yashiro been making an honest effort to get out of the organization? Not showing ambition is one thing but...