Le Apricot's Topics (452)

I was caught while waiting for my date... praying nothing suggestive on the screen. knowing him i wouldn't be able to get rid of the following jokes for lifetime. How do you explain you enjoy some deep gay stories with super explicit scenes for fun and justify yourself as a normal person?

Can someone find a escuse for that ? Then i could use that excuse ヽ(`Д´)ﾉ

yep

That was the first thing that popped into my head too.

Gonna have to disagree. He was cheating on his wife, that pretty much puts him in the "shit" category right from the start. To top it off, he refused to communicate his feelings, thoughts and plans to Shouji. Opting, instead, to lie and deceive him, and his wife, until his hand was forced. Shimadu would not have bothered to go to Shouji's place the night his wife followed him and explain the situation about his wife being suspicious if he had not seen that Shouji was showing an interest in Minami when they went to lunch together. He did that to manipulate Shouji into staying with him as his "hidden toy". When Shimadu talks to Minami about separating from his wife he is only trying to intimidate Minami. Even if he was serious, he likely wasn't separating for Shouji's sake or he would have done it before his wife followed him to Shouji's home. The more likely scenario was that it was his wife who wanted the separation and Shimadu didn't want to be lonely wirhout his "toy". Shimadu was, and remained, a selfish shit right up to the end. His "game" at the cafe when he noticed Minami walking up is proof. His joke could have caused a problem between Shouji and Minami if their relationship and trust was not as strong as it was. Even if the problem was only a small argument, it still showed that Shimadu didn't care if he brought pain to Shouji. He would rather see Shouji fight with Minami, even after claiming that he wished them happiness, than allow a chance to make Minami jealous pass by. He did the things that pleased himself without caring how his actions affected those around him. Shimadu was a shit, a selfish, thoughtless, uncaring, manipulative shit. Sorry.

Did you miss the 'total' next to the shit? No one said he wasn't shit just that he didn't go down the stalk-abuse-kidnap-then-rape route thus keeping him from scoring a full ten in the shitty-ex category. So again, he is crap just not the worst piece of crap.

LMAOOOOO

Oh, "total", I see. So, a rapist isn't a murderer, but which one is really worse? The one who takes a life or the one who destroys a person entirely and lets them live on in fear? Hmmm... semantics. They are both equally vile.

NotATotalPieceOfShitEx was a cheater not a rapist or murderer. Cheating is a shitty act not a criminal one. So I'll say it again. Yes, he's a shitty ex but not a total piece of shit.

I'm going to assume that you are not a native English speaker and that you are unfamiliar with the use of analogies in English. That was an analogy used to quickly and accurately make a point. Now, since you didn't grasp the analogy, I'll give you the long version. Cheating is a form of emotional abuse and emotional abuse leaves scars of distrust equally as deep as the distrust felt when a partner physically abuses you. Sometimes, they are even deeper when emotional abuse is all that is done because, for most, physical abuse is a deal breaker, but cheating can be forgiven or ignored. The fact that you say, "he *only* cheated" and others have said, "he wasn't a *total* shit" is proof that emotional abuse is, in fact, overlooked by some. Abuse is abuse, regardless of the type and when it is allowed to continue without intervention, more victims of the abuser will pile up over time. Emotional abuse is not criminally punished by law the way physical abuse is, so people often allow emotional abuse to continue on because they feel helpless. This does not mean that emotional abuse is less damaging. Now, here is where the analogy comes in... The crime of rape is not always a violent act, but is is always emotionally scarring to the victim. Murder *is* always a violent act and the victim always loses their life. However, the victim of murder does not carry fear and insecurity around with them for the next several decades the way a rape victim does. Rape correlates to emotional abuse, where murder correlates to physical abuse. Not many people would think, "Oh well, at least that person is only a rapist and not a murderer." Right? The crime of rape (first degree, aggravated assault) and the crime of murder both have the same sentence - 20 years to life. They are viewed with equal contempt. Being an emotional abuser is equally as harmful as being a physical abuser, if not more so, because emotional abuse is so easily overlooked. We wouldn't overlook rape simply because the victim was not murdered. Why would you overlook emotional abuse simply because it wasn't physical abuse?

Tl;Dr
Your analogy was flawed given that the circumstances behind the comment, which apparently offends you so dearly, did not warrant such a dramatic response. As far as having a firm grasp on the English Language I suggest that you calm yourself and read the words you seem to be unable to understand. "The ex-boyfriend is a horrible character but (note this 'but' and the words preceeding it) he is not the worse character ever conceived."
Or in simpler terms: "Not a complete piece of shit."
It is beyond my understanding as to why you think the original comment or my own comment validates the act of cheating or cheaters.
Have a nice day ~

Be sure to remember your words here when your partner cheats on you. Remember... they weren't a "complete piece of shit."

Thank you. I guess some people are okay with emotional abuse where you and I are not. Well, they are okay with it until they are the victim of it, I suppose.

Infidelity is a criminal offence in some countries including mine. Just saying..