So I kind of don't believe in love. As in I believe you can love someone (like when you love your family and friends) but i don't believe u can fall in love (not all the time though).
So for me, I have seen what love can do with someone. For example my parents. My mom was deeply in love with my dad till the point it cost her mental health. (By the way my dad was 49 and my mom was 20 went they had me).
Because of the whole thing i went up for adoption. By the way my dad was marry at that time. My dad hav 9 children outside of his marriage. All of his children have different mother.
I have seen a lot of couples break up because they have cheat or they can't gree or they stop love each other. Or when they do fall in love they do the stupidest thing because they "love" the person. And i don't want that
For me liking or having a crush on a guy scares me..
Because i don't want to be like mom.
There are times my friends or my crush ask me why are you single. And i would give them a stupid reason such as i don't want to be in relationship. Or i like being single. Or no one likes me. Which is a lie.
I don't think i have ever tell my friends the really reason.
I'm just scared. I do want to fall in love but i don't want to at the same time.
Love is scary and sometimes males don't make it for you like them either. Same goes for female.
And because of all this I have become very clingy andd possessive over my friends. I would get jealous if they get close to people who aren't me.
So sometimes I work as a assistant teacher on a Saturday....so that teacher have known me from grade 6(when I was 11 turning 12) till now (I'm 18).
So I told him that I want to learn how to drive. He said "Ok I will teach you." He started to teach me and then couple of weeks have past since he had started to teach me. So when we were driving he started to touch me and I told him to stop and he said that I must concentrate on driving. He claim that the reason why he did it was because he want me to get soon to male touching me. That didn't make sense so from that day I keep my distance from him. So recently he ask for a hug and I hug him and he touch me on my bottom. I got so upset and start to curse him....... I don't like when people touch me because it feels very disgusting at times and that day I felt really disgusted. He claim that he likes me and I don't believe him and I don't want to be with him and he have admitted to me that he have sex with another person who he had teach and that if I ever said that I want to have sex with him he wouldn't refuse.... everytime I think about it I feel sick to my stomach and he keeps on saying that he care for me....And he want me to go to his house basically when his wife and kids are not there.... By the way he is married and have kids and he is 40 something.
By the way I'm a virgin.
I want to tell my mom but i don't know how to tell her or anyone.
I tried keeping the distance but my mom started getting upset because she want me to earn money and i didn't tell her the reason why i didn't want to go there.
I felt weird around him since i started working so i tell my friend who have known him as long as i have. She said maybe i am being too conscious but he wouldn't do anything like but now i realize i wasn't being over conscious. I haven't tell that friend about it because she won't see and she won't work there.
I just want to erase it from my memory and don't ever see him.
I really hope you get away from that creep soon and find a person who respects your boundaries.
i really hope you report him.he'll probably do the same to other people seeing as how he's harrassing you who he knows for years already
Go on a drive with him once more but this time record his conversation and then report . Don't let him know about the evidence.
Report that pervert, let him know what's the consequences to his actions. Never let people take advantage of you.
wow that guy needs to be in jail asap
I always said that if i die before my husband is that i don't want him to marry anyone else and have any girlfriend. He can have sex friends but no lover so that he can get rid of his sexual frustration.
My reason for this is because I would be in the spirit world and i don't want to see him loving someone more than me or equally as me. And when he is in the spirit world who is going to choose. Me or his other wife. Thinking about it gets me frustrating and angry. My friends and teachers think that I'm sick or insane, for not letting my future to love someone else but am I sick or insane?
I can't be the only one thinking this way?
Btw i am just 18 and I'm not marrying.
You are noy insane, but that is not a healthy way of thinking because you saying to someone you love that if you are ever gone they shouldn't be happy with another person (as you said he could relieve sexual frustration but that would be only physical, but what about his mental health?), I would strongly reccomend going to a psychologist to see why you are thinking in that particular way as the peson you would marry is the person you are supposed to love the most.
I believe that in the spirit world earthly relationships will lose all their relevance, in losing our corporeal bodies and our material possessions. Otherwise, what's the point of leaving your body if you're still keeping all the things you had physical attachments to? It's like leaving a toxic relationship just to enter into another one that is with a different person but is just as toxic (shitty analogy, I tried). I don't know how your way of thinking makes you sick or insane; it just means you're a little paranoid. And that's okay. If you're in a relationship, these things probably won't matter to you nearly as much as they do now (maybe?).
If you're really that worried, think about it this way. A person can have many crushes and relationships until they find the one they want to marry/spend the rest of their life with. This, if we consider those only choosing monogamous relationships. I see that you are really spiritual, but to make the best out of your personal spirituality, and your peace of mind, I suggest not holding onto toxic paranoid feelings. So, let me get to my point. A person can have many crushes until one day they meet "the one". And if you're an idealist, then you know what I'm talking about, and you probably want this person to be your "Soulmate" or some equivalent to that. If you believe the person you chose is your soulmate, then it doesn't matter what relationships they get into after you're gone from the world. Just like the little relationships your partner would have had before they even met YOU (the Soulmate), they can still have those little relationships after, but no one would ever be the same as you (the Soulmate). Does it feel better already? So when you both join up again in the afterlife, it's clear that your Soulmate will put you above any other soul 'cause, like, you were made to complete each other. :) If you want my personal views for your comparison, I believe in both afterlife and reincarnations & soulmates. I think that in the grand scheme of things, your soulmate is the one you have the most profound love with. But.. love. Do love. Follow your heart, even if it chooses the wrong people sometimes, learn from your mistakes by knowing what you want instead, and keep following that heart, until you find the person you love so so so so much that you even wish they wouldn't be lonely if you died before them. Unconditional love is a thing that you learn through life experience, and it is the most powerful love out there.
So, if he dies first, you won't allow yourself to ever, ever love anyone, even a little bit, but will go out and have lots of sex with men you don't care about? That seems terribly lonely and sad. My cousin lost her husband, and is now in a new happy relationship, I do not see that as bad, and I am sure her late hubby is okay with her not being alone for the rest of her life.
Just give it a few more years and u would be over all these fairytails
I think it'll get better once you're in a relationship. You'll love them so much that you'll simply want them to be happy...... Never mind. I've never dated anyone so I don't know (●￣(ｴ)￣●)
If it were me, i wouldnt even want him to have physical relationships. But i dont even wanna get married so meh
Buddha itself! I'm currently reading a spiritual book and now I'm convinced the author quote you.
Haha really? I'm honored ヾ(☆▽☆)
I want to read more supernatural yaoi but I can't find any
I think I have read all of them
And I want to read gangster yaoi and I can't find I am really sad because I yaoi is like life it makes me very
Can i get some good harlequin to read please?