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Spoiler..
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She is just disgusted by the emperor.
In the later parts when even when they fall in love she just staright up.vomits on the emperor when they try to have sex because she thought about the emperor as a male prostitute who has been touching too many women and the thought of him touching her makes her vomit as a reflex.
This whole novel is gold.
![](https://pic1.mangapicgallery.com/r/avatar/52/u21934_50x50.jpg?2)
I don't know manga chapters but this is from the novel.
I think it was a few chp before the ending I don't know to remember for sure. but I do remember the part where the emperor had to dismiss the harem and stay chaste for some time before the empress finally relented but only by a bit. the emperor almost went crazy.
![](https://pic1.mangapicgallery.com/r/avatar/85/u70545_50x50.jpg?2)
Spoiler alert
He fucking raped her. I fucking hate this. When someone doesn't move during sex(rape) they're usually blocking it out and hoping it ends faster. Why the fuck didn't y'all say there was rape please I am literally sobbing. I felt so uncomfortable land started crying. If the manga goes the same route I'm dropping it.
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Some people (I am one of those) who sympathize with jongchan more. It is how it is. I can't sympathize with the uke because I can't say I understand his situation and if I had been in the seme's position I would probably react the same way. And then try to analyse the situation and go for it again. This is a prime example of INTJ personality, people. So if u meet someone later who is like this just remember we are easy to dislike because our eq is basically a stone, we are workoholic and planner and unable to consider human emotions but at the end we are human too and probably we'll say it straight to the face than bitching behind ur back when we like u.
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Intj here...that totally explains my frustration with the uke.
Me, I would have been:
Like...it's the past. Wth does it have to do with the now? Or us? It was a friggin" one sided crush you never acted one. Don't blame me for your inability to sh*t or get off the pot.
And then I would have walked and most likely ended the relationship, 'cause I ain't got time for emotionally wishy-washy people.
![](https://pic1.mangapicgallery.com/r/avatar/cc/u24841_50x50.jpg?2)
Same.
And I'll say, Yes, yes, yes, you entitled the feelings you have, go to the corner and cry for whatever it is you feel you need to cry about, and I'll go.
What makes me angry is that the protagonist feels entitled to his feelings no matter how illogical and nonsense his feelings are, but at the same time he wants to be understood about it, he belittles the feeling of Section Chef.
What a hard thing to say that he needed time to think and manage his feelings. Rather than avoiding and depicting someone who has absolutely nothing to do with it--other than being the lover of his first love, as the villain in his failed first love story.
![](https://pic1.mangapicgallery.com/r/avatar/52/u21934_50x50.jpg?2)
but I kinda relate to the section chief more.
for me, I tend to stray away from emotional troubles so people around me say i am too emotionally detached. I tend to concentrate more on the practicality which comes off cold and harsh, I know this is my fault but it is hard to change.
i find people like seunghyun who are sensitive and high eq difficult to deal with. as much as they are appealing because they can express themselves dealing with them is difficult. empathizing itself is pretty hard for me.
i was a bit frustrated at myself for a while but i came to accept it.
there are just different kind of people in the world.
![](https://pic1.mangapicgallery.com/r/avatar/74/u479513_50x50.jpg?2)
This!!! I was raised to believe that showing emotion was weak and unnecessary and that other people deserved it more than me, so in a sense it is relatable. Relatable in a sense than now that I have grown, I find it hard to show emotion and at times I even push it away. Pushing away emotions can often unintentionally hurts others and I have come to realize that. I used to find emotional people annoying and “doing too much” which I still partially believe to this day. I can’t help that and neither can they. There’s just different kinds of people, and not everyone understands that:/
![](https://pic1.mangapicgallery.com/r/avatar/52/u21934_50x50.jpg?2)
I totally relate. Though it was not like something I was taught more like I was born like this. I take after my father. We both have this kind of personality that makes unapproachable and cold. My mother is completely opposite though.
Two different ppl can exist if they just understand each other. People are different so it's better not to push your ideals on another.
Thanks for the reply though. Good to see I am not alone.
oh my! someone call the ambulance there is a case of 3rd-degree burn here