Egg's Topics (37)

Personal rating: 9/10. i get the criticism about this being too slow but i really like the slowness of the story. it’s shounen ai, yes, but i feel like the romance is a side plot and it works for the story. i loveee idol stories (read Debut Or Die and I Became The Youngest Top Idol if you like this story yall!) and so im used to them just having bromance and no BL.

One thing this story does that most reincarnation stories (both the female and the male ones) don’t do is a focus on the person MC replaces. Usually, the person the mc replaces never thinks about what happened to them, but this one really cares about the person they replaced and wants to do them justice. I love that, and I think it’s bittersweet.


one complaint i do have is that i think this story has too many side plots? i mean, maybe the author is going to tie them all up together in some way later on but for now i do think the author is detracting a little from the main plot. either way, this is a bit of a nitpick.

i love all the characters, especially the main MC and the og guy he replaces. wish there could’ve been a way for them to interact, but alas, he is long gone. ;-;

that guy is a certified lover boy certified pedophile

wanna read this but does it have bromance like debut or die? would love something similar(づ￣ ³￣)づ

So I thought I would give this a 6.5/10, but I thought harder and the more I was typing the ending review Inwas like fuck that this ending is so ass I’m making this a 5/10.

I just like realized that the main conflict of the story never actually got resolved. So these two little magical creatures are beefing and they get Chiwoo and Hwan to basically be their fighters, but even in the ending of the story they’re still beefing. A new magical boy is shown in the ending, which means… That the conflict was just thrown under the rug. The cycle of these creatures preying on desperate people wanting to make a wish for their lives to be better continues… And innocent casualties will continue to die or be traumatized again and again for the sake of this petty beef between these dumbasses… Great.

Anyways, ending is dog shit. This is the template I would use in a writing seminar on how NOT to write your endings. Chiwoo basically reverts everything. He basically causes a change in the timeline they live in, the main difference now is that he is able to save his parents, causing Hwan and Chiwoo to never being magical boys, and thus the main story events never existed. Chiwoo now also doesn’t know Hwan, and lived a completely different life. He is now happy. And of course they meet again and fall in love.

THIS FUCKING SUCKS. So basically you’re spitting on the love story you crafted, the entire plot of your story by putting them in a reimagined timeline. Why?? This is basically saying that if life gives you shitty circumstances, you can’t move on from them. Rather than your characters attempting to recover from their mistakes and move on from their trauma, they need divine intervention itself to come in and give them their happy ending. Basically, your characters don’t get to make their own happy ending, they have to be given it. It’s so unearned.

Your main protagonist doesn’t even know his own story. The last half of the season switches to Hwan’s pov, kept even in the final chapter. our protagonist doesn’t even get his own monologue, reflection, or literally anything in the last chapter. It’s literally his own story and the man is now a side character in the final season. I especially think this sucks because Chiwoo is a man who was depressed and dying in the inside from his lack of agency and stuck in his position of not being able to save everyone and thinking he is the cause of everyone suffering. If you were going to stick with this ending, fine. But I think it would’ve been more emotional if Chiwoo ends up remembering everything and sees how everybody in his life is happy, purely because of what he had done. But nope, we live in a dystopia of those events. Let’s be honest, Chiwoo is a diff person now, he has a support system, and plenty of friends. He doesn’t live with the insecurity of being an orphan, nor did he have to be groomed to completely relying on Hwan to be his rock. So for me, the Chiwoo that gets to have a happy ending is not the same Chiwoo that I grew attached to. If you really want to be technical about it, it feels like Chiwoo died for Hwan to be happy, and that just doesn’t sit right with me. It’s not simply that Chiwoo lost his memories. It’s not a Pearl Boy situation. It’s that Chiwoo lived a different life, and thus is a different person. You could’ve had the ending be that Hwan be transported to an alternate dimension and I would’ve had the same exact opinion. Bc that’s basically what this is.

To give a one sentence summary of this story: This is a porny, BL version of Madoka Magica. Even the ending was similar to Madoka, but like… badly written.

For those looking to read this: it’s not bad. I overall liked the story and if you like yanderes, you’ll like this. But I and most people don’t like the ending. It’s not the worst, but it’s definitely bad. It ends happily… But not the way you want it to.

Long ass review incoming(has spoilers, not including ending that’s a different review):
I REALLY liked the first half of the story. I’m someone who eats up yanderes so initially I was fine with the darker turn the story took. So I wanna start out with the positives. I love the art. The art is gorgeous and the characters are very expressive. The artist is very good at being able to express the tone with her art. I also really liked our MC Chiwoo. He’s utterly adorable and I actually really liked the way his trauma and sadness was written throughout the story. He’s a happy guy that likes somebody he feels like he shouldn’t, and then later on when his heart is shattered by that very man he loves his mental health goes downhill, and by the third season where he has nobody and nothing he’s almost completely different. His downward spiral was not badly written and I was able to sympathize a lot with him. I have a controversial take: I actually liked the initial direction Hwan (our ML)’s character was going. In the first season, you see everything purely from Chiwoo’s pov, so you think Hwan is a nice, kind guy who loves Chiwoo in a friendly way. This does get torn away tho, because of a non-con scene where he takes advantage of Chiron when he’s asleep. I thought it was interesting at first, seeing this guy we think is just chill and nice, but has a dark side hidden. The story also brushes it off, and Chiwoo never finds out, so it’s almost like the readers are put unease, b/c this guy is clearly not a good person, but he’s always super nice so is it just a one off thing? The 2nd season is where we find out tho, that this guy is a dark, possessive character who has actually never been who we thought he was. I loved this, and then I didn’t. Which leads me to my criticisms of the story.

I feel like the issue this story has is that it has three seasons, and every season has an incredibly different tone that Sagold (artist and author) guns for, which was really not a good idea. If she was a better writer, I think she could’ve pulled it off. But… she’s not, so it just feels like she has an idea in her head with what direction to take the story, but then every seasonal break decides she doesn’t like it and wants to take a different approach. The first season was filled with *interesting* sex scenes, so it was kinda fun even though they’re pretty non-consent. Each villain’s character design is actually peak, and honestly every villain was dare I say hotter than the ML himself. You can tell Sagold had fun crafting their designs. The second season you get to know more about Hwan(the ML), and the darker feelings he has for Chiwoo(our cutie mc). The third season is just kinda… Bad. It felt like the author didn’t know how to end it bc she wanted our leads to get back together, but realized she didn’t know how to write it. This ties back to my criticism of Hwan and Sagold. Sagold writes Hwan’s unforgivable actions, but then realizes now in the third season that by this point there’s no easy way of making Chiwoo come back to him within the length of 17 chapters she outlines her final season to have. She tries to make him more sympathetic, but her own writing bites her in the ass b/c season 2 focuses a lot on Chiwoo’s friendship with the 2nd ML and how much he cares for him. So now in season 3 she tries to de-emphasize Hwan’s bad actions and more focus on how his life sucks without Chiwoo in an attempt to make the readers like him again. The issue with writing a redemption arc is that you have to be good at it. Sagold is not. Your characters can be evil, but you cant easily turn them from horrible, killing-your-best-friend-evil, to i’m-so-horrible-for-you-leave-me-alone-edgy emo kid Hwan is in the last five chapters of the story. Imo, she should’ve just stuck to her guns and just made Hwan stay as he was in season 2, and if she really wanted to keep Chiwoo and Hwan together perhaps made Chiwoo more depressed and in turn more willing to stay with Hwan, who knows all of Chiwoo’s secrets and so is the only person who truly knows Chiwoo. Chiwoo is lonely and lost, so making him feel tethered to Hwan, and rationalizes to himself why Hwan would kill 2nd ML.

Writing a review of the ending as a diff post because this is too long lmao.

6/10. TLDR: Art and the exploration of american gangs is good, Ian is an okay-ish character but feels like he's leading the two love interests on, and jo would be a useless character if and only if he doesnt end up with ian.

feels like ian is leading them both on, unintentionally of course. dont like how it feels as if ian is aware that both tj and jo have feelings for him that extend beyond sexual, and yet still continues to have sex with both of them. he made comments in earlier chapters that indicate that he does, like how jo has the same obsessive look in his eyes that are reminicient of how tj looks at him. idk, either u shut them down completely or get someone else to have sex with u if u prefer something purely sexual.

the art is great, and the story itself is very intriguing. i like the exploration of american gangs and the struggles that the side characters have in the rabbit hole of debt. this story probably has one of the best portrayals ive seen in manhwas about mafias in general.

now here comes my problem. ian. one thing i want to say is that ian is clearly the main focus of the story, and is rightfully considered the protagonist. an interesting point can be made though, is that you actually rarely see things from his perspective. in fact, you barely see his thoughts at all. Ian is the protagonist, but the narrators of his story are TJ and Jo. Which I find very intriguing, but the story does sort of suffer for this. Mostly because I cant really find it in myself to see what TJ and Jo like ian for aside from superficial reasons like attraction. Their feelings are very intense, but i still dont get why. Ian is a good character, for sure, but i dont see him as a likeable partner to either of these people. TJ makes more sense, seeing as the proximity that he and Ian had for years before progressing something sexual.

Jo, i dont really understand at all why he would like Ian. They've had some cute scenes, but aside from the stargazing scene most of their chemistry revolves around how Jo is good for Ian and then them having sex.

The story suffers from just not having a pov from ian, really. this goes back to my earlier point. u dont see his inner thoughts so i cant understand why he, who is aware that jo likes him, and he mentioned in passing that he knows tj is obsessed with him, continues to pursue something sexual with the both of them which feels like he's leading both on. yes, he did make it clear he just wants something sexual. but i also just dont get why he thinks its a good idea to keep on going with making his important relationships sexual if its clear that both parties want you to themselves. regardless, without the key input from ian's head, he just comes across constantly horny

for what its worth, i did like the part where he interacts withthe female character that ian finds a resemblance of his mom to. its a random point, but its the first time u really see ian trying to do something that doesnt involve the other two main characters from their pov.

another point im going to have that is probably a controversial take is that jo's character is potentially pointless if he doesnt get with ian. this sounds bad, because it almost makes him feel like a plot device, but if ian really does end up with TJ, i just wouldnt really see the point of Jo's character in the story. U could make the argument that he shows the life of what it could be like for ian to step away from the mafia scene, but the thing is is that before even meeting jo ian already plans on leaving the mafia altogether, so the point is moot.

do i think ian has more chemistry with TJ? Yes. However, i think from a writing standpoint it makes sense to end the story with ian and jo, only because its more satisfying to see ian finally leave the crime space he himself says he's been wanting to leave, and i think the author is trying to make jo representative of that.

will say i can agree that everything felt rushed. i was kinda confused opening this up and seeing the chapter titled the end and then was like huhh were we not getting an exposition dump like last chapter about his family's blood??? idk that seemed like it was going to lead into something. ik we're getting side stories, so maybe we'll see more stuff about it there but i dont ever think it's a good idea to introduce things that seem like main story elements into ur side stories. not everyone's going to read them and side stories should just be kept as fluff. speaking of i cant wait to see some cute shit for our main pairing there!!

in any case, i think that i will give this story a 7/10. couldve been bumped to a 9 if this story at the very least had ten more chapters. the story's beginning and middle were slow burn, and i think it wouldve been good seeing how the two leads acted as a couple and how they would approach the ml's father. the ml's whole family seemed like they were going to be dealt with next after mc took care of the vampire he hated most, but we didnt get to see whatever bs ml's father had in store.

Rating: 5/10- Just fine. Enjoyed for guilty pleasure, but hard to ignore the glaring writing issues.
TLDR: If you like yandere male leads, and need a story to just turn your brain off, this is for you. If you are looking for a well-written story, this is not for you.

LONG REVIEW:
I like yanderes and the art style, so i think thats why this story was for me. I'll also give it credit that i wasnt bored at all, the murder "mystery" plus the prince's antics (male lead) was fun. It hit all the check boxes for a yandere story, plus the MC was cute.

But that's honestly all I really have to say.

Writing issues:
The story fully relies on MC's passivity and ignorance that borders on naivety so that the author can continue to write the narrative that they want without any obstacles. Male lead imprisons MC? Is fine with it. Male lead tells the entire country that they are married without even informing him? Is fine with it. Male lead not telling MC that he slept with him and is aware that he is the father? Was mad initially, but fine with it immediately and his feelings are brushed off. Male lead continuing to assault MC? Well, MC states to his concerned friend that he could've easily overpowered him but chose not to.... Which isn't really a good excuse. You still need verbal confirmation for it to be considered full consent, as well as the fact that MC is the servant of the crown prince, who's basically the second most powerful person in the country. Regardless of the fact that MC COULD take him down, there's nothing really stopping the prince calling treason and having him beheaded. So to state it simply, MC is in a disadvantageous position, and even when he states in their sex scenes "stop" the prince continues his merry way with his assumption and the reader's assurance that if MC really wanted everything to stop, he could just take him down.

In any case, I'm here because I like yanderes, so while the dubious consent doesnt bother ME much, I'm going to continue talking about why MC's passivity bothers me a lot.

It's because the author doesnt really know how to write conflict. The MC is fine with letting the prince do what he wants, and when he does even show the mildest discomfort, the other characters or the prince hold it up against his head and say "Well think of the investigation!" but nobody in the really thinks "Well isn't the prince kind of an asshole for not immediately giving his aid and only gives it when MC finally gives him what he wants(his attention)?" When MC for once skips dinner to focus on his work, prince gets pissed and withdraws his help which leads to another murder. Everyone blames MC for prioritizing his work WHICH INVOLVES BRINGING MURDER AND RAPE VICTIMS TO JUSICE, so you'd think that at least the side characters would side with him... but everybody is upset at him.

I like yandere stories, but I don't like it when even the author portrays the main character in the wrong for not giving the yandere what he wants.

The MC has no backbone to stand on, which directly conflicts with his line of work. He's basically a lead detective that works part of the royal guard, but you're telling me he wouldn't be a guy who stands on business? Everybody continues to be like this is your problem

This leads to my next problem: the romance.

The story immediately establishes that the prince is obsessed with MC. Since they were in school. But we dont really get a reason why. MC also falls in love with the prince. But again, we dont really understand why.

As the readers, we can choose why we like the characters. You might like the prince because he's hot, and he's obsessive, and psychotic. You might like the MC because he's cute and kind and lovable stupid.

But we don't really get why they love each other.

There's not really much we see from their academy days, and the closest MC explains as to why he likes the prince is because "he's kind, attractive and unpredictable" being attracted to a person is definitely one of the first parts in being interested in someone, but that's not really supposed to be a reason why you stay with them. And to be honest, the prince isn't really kind to MC. He chooses when to give MC what he wants only after MC does whatever the prince asks. And the prince makes pretty harsh remarks on how basically MC sleeps around. Definitely not how I picture my man being "nice" to me. The only part that actually is valid point is the prince being unpredictable, but we've never had an indication that MC liked that about the prince. If anything, when the prince does stuff that shocks him he's usually uncomfortable.

Imma be honest the story's main points that it focuses on are: MC's pregnancy, murder "mystery" and who is "Daddy", and then some smut sprinkled on the way. The story's main genre is romance, but it's crazy that there is so much of the prince and MC's screen time together and yet they still never actually had in depth conversations. It just basically felt like MC begging for help and prince badgering MC to take care of himself more.

I don't think a story needs to be deep or complex to be good. A good ROMANCE story, however, needs to show the readers why the characters like each other, even if the characters themselves can't put it into words as to why they like each other; I'm sure every romance connoisseur has seen a variation of the line "I don't why I love them, I don't when I started to love them, I just do".

Yool (seme) is a red flag but im colorblind. either way, pretty interesting read. im so curious to see Howoo's (mc) reaction to him figuring it out everything. its not going to end well lmao

ike i cant compute. at first i didnt like the art that much but it grew on me and now like 200 chapters i literally have a fatass crush on everyone

anyways peak story. i was kinda scared that i would get bored because there were so many chapters and ive never read a bl over 100 chapters aside from full volume. but i actually never got bored and love the characters. felix and giovanni my beloveds <3