caekes

also im in no way implying that ppl with mental illnesses cant be in a relationship (i just realised it may come off that way), but that some ppl are simply not ready to be in one

Ohh interesting looking manga. Also yeah, its more complex than just “talk and everything will sort out”. Communication can be unhealthy. Boundaries are king (=・ω・=)

Communication can save or kill a relationship as it entirely depends on your partner's attitude. But from my experience it is toxic and hard to be in a relationship with a person who has mental illness. My ex would threaten me that he would commit suicide if I break up with him. My tip is to first check a person's attitude and mental stability because you want to spend your time wisely on a proper person.

Ngl thats pretty unfair~ your exes issue wasn’t their mental illness. Partners can be abusive w/o mental illness and mental illness isn’t a predictor. That’s like saying “dont date someone who looks unhealthy because they could have a chronic illness and youd have to take care of them. Find someone easier instead”. *Everyone* has issues in their life, a partners meant to understand and help with them.

i agree with your sentiments here. while i a hundred percent support open communications in any relationship we also still have to realize that some relationships aren't as salvageable. don't make "oh we just haven't talked it out" and "we lacked communication" an excuse to still stay in your relationship, especially if its toxic/abusive. sometimes, even when you talk and communicate to a person they won't always want to hear you out and listen. sometimes if a person doesn't want to hear something they just keep their ears closed and not respect you wishes.

please, if anyone is in that kind of a relationship where you feel like you're slowly losing your voice even with all the communication you try to give them. if anyone wants to hurt you both physically and emotionally for wanting to be open with each other and talk. and if anyone feels like their partner is being toxic and manipulating them into thinking that staying in this relationship is for the best regardless of how hurt you already are - PLEASE LEAVE!!! no amount of "communication" could help this people (except for therapy maybe??) and your relationship with them. you being wounded isn't a sign of loyalty and faith in you relationship, its a sign of being abused.

Well he was diagnosed with depression so I will consider that as a legitimate indicator of mental illness. I honestly think if you can't love or handle yourself properly then you should not enter into a relationship at all because you are only searching for validation from another person. Maybe you should try entering a relationship with a person who has a mental illness and you may realize what I am getting at. A partner can only help you in life if you know how to help yourself first. I am just giving my real life experience and it is up to you if you want to try a relationship with a mentally ill person. It can serve as a good real life experience and you will learn a lot from that kind of a relationship.

well i don't know about you but mental illness doesn't stop at depression only. anxiety, adhd, and bipolar disorders are one of the most common ones. while i agree with your sentiment here that a person should love themself first before loving anyone else, i didn't really understand why and how you painted mental illness as no-pass card for relationships, given that a lot of mental illness isn't really cureable (you can only subdue its tendencies through medications). and also, depression can take in many forms; it can make you lethargic, anxious, empty, or in your exe's case - suicidal. so yeah, not every depressed person is gonna threaten their partner they might end their life it they leave :))

What i meant is that mental illness isnt a predictor of an abusive partner. *I* have mental illnesses and I'd hate for someone I care about to say I'm just a "good real life experience to learn from", rather than a regular person. You can't generalize that every mentally ill person can't love or handle themselves properly. Threatening to kill yourself to get your way isn't a symptom of depression, it's a manipulation tactic that abusers use.

^^this. Not just medication but therapy and an understanding support system are important too. If you can't let go of ur judgement then youre not a good support.

I'm just honestly giving my tips and real life experience from all of my past relationships. As not everyone can handle those kinds of relationships.

I understand that not every mentally-ill person will act in a negative way. I am just basing my opinion from all of my past relationships and it is still up to the person to take my advice or not as they will be the ones who enter in that kind of relationship. This is just me hoping that no one will ever experience those kind of toxic relationships. (⌒▽⌒)