the heel turn at the with "im not man or woman" that just oh so conveniently denies trans women their womanhood. It was not a narrative about being nonbinary. I will say this is my personal experience many have shared with me, is that people treated me far differently for being "undecided" about my gender but when I asserted myself as a woman, it was knives out. There's a lot of reason why "are you a boy or a girl" stings trans women in particular, there is a reason there is the impulse to defer the question. There is some implicit understanding that if we answer girl, that gets scrutinized, re-negotiated, we end up back in "boy" effectively. The way it is framed by cis people, "woman" is something we are always told we will never be. That pain gets internalized and that question becomes one some trans people don't wanna engage with, and that shouldn't be like oh that must mean [she] was not actually a woman either and we can keep [her] in limbo (effectively man). Some people will take the compromise of deferring the question for the sake of marginally more acceptance. I wish this nuance was outlined, it seems a little off-context to the messaging overall, what with cinema club gay guy, takemoto, and aoi herself, to idle in this in-between, especially when it didnt do something as recant on how her dysphoria was still affecting her. There was no "and they (sic) became okay with their body :) after figuring out they're not man or woman" silliness contrived, they went no, she's still dysphoric about herself but she's not hiding that. And that was literally done by throwing off the mens' coat. Just a weird mismatch. Especially when she was like, "well the whole mask thing was just a veneer of deniability and i just actually wanted to be a girl that's liked by everyone, and it became who I was"
Don't get me wrong!! I still enjoyed the manga. It just didn't seem to fully grasp onto the "difficult" answer that Aoi knows she is a woman by the end. It left room for some types to be "well akshually" about it. There's a difference between centering cis ppls feelings and centering the way the trans person has to navigate them, and i wish the latter was more prevalent than the former. Especially with Rika mentioning the LGBT, wish at the very least we both got more internalization between the both of them that goes like beyond oh yeah its weird now that I'm like this. Rika could have easily said it was weird for her too. Aoi could have reflected more on trans identity specifically, but then, we couldn't have that ambiguity that appeals to cis people now would we?
PLEASE I NEED MORE PLEASE ANYTHING LIKE THIS PLEASE
Plot: This story is set in Cambodia. War has ravaged the country year after year, leaving behind it ...
- Author: fukaya akira
- Genres: Drama / Historical / Seinen