yet here you are, with an account, with multiple manga in your profile...
Play with her tits, not her heart. Make his dick hard, not his life.
One day I was in the mood, so I whipped out my dildo, dimmed the lights, and started to do my thing. I was almost to the point of climax when I heard a knock on the door. I thought if I ignored it they'd go away, so I continued but was interrupted again when I almost got to the point of sweet pleasure. I threw on a robe, too angry to even look out ......
So one day I decided to try something a little different. I figured looking at some naughty stuff on a bigger screen would make for a better experience. So, I used the internet browser on the Wii in my living room to do just that, while my parents were out of the house. I was going at it fully naked, because why not? And then, suddenly, I heard foo......
Askhole is a person who constantly asks for your advice, yet always does the opposite of what you tell them. And then telling them "I told you so" is the most satisfying thing in the world ʕ•̫͡•ʔ♬✧
I was really drunk one night at a friend’s house. He was asleep, and his mom had gone to work (night shift). Well, I’m laying on the couch, and I grab my laptop to look at some porn. Next thing I know, it’s morning. I had fallen asleep before doing anything. My laptop is on the coffee table, with the lid closed. I think nothing about it. Then......
My dad walked in on me in high school, and I couldn't get my vibrator to shut off, so I kept talking to cover the humming noises. On another note, I walked in on him in our study watching porn and he couldn't get the remote to change the channel, so I guess we are even.
Recently I came out, and as a gift, my best friends took me to a sex store and bought me a lot of toys. So when I came back from college on spring break, I stayed at my father's house. One day while everyone was away I decided to whip out my new dildo; I was totally in my own world, and didn't hear my father open the front door to the house. But so......
My best friend told me that one time he got home from school, thinking he beat everyone home, and decided it was a good time to log into his favorite porn site to jerk off. He said he was too busy "violently cumming" to hear when his dad walked into the room. His dad cleared his throat and my friend made eye contact with him, penis in hand. My bes......
I was beating off in the shower one time. I don’t know why, but whenever there is water around it takes me forever to cum. Anyway, I was going hard for about 45 minutes. When I eventually came, the orgasm was so powerful that I slipped over and hit my head. Obviously I didn’t learn from the experience because I still do it all the time.
Then the librarian told me to take it out.
They’re always popping up at inopportune times and they deserve a good beating.
The husband decided to make his password “my dick,” but his wife fell on the floor laughing. The computer said the password was too short.
If someone tells you a racist, sexist or homophobic joke, don't get mad at them. Just tell them you don't get it. Keep telling them you don't get it until they are forced to explain why women/ minorities/ homosexuals are stupid/ etc. Then just walk away. This is actually the best possible reaction, because this way you don't just get them mad, y......
I was running late for school, and would have to get a lift in anyhow. I decided as I had the time and the night before had been particularly..arousing, dream wise, I'd enjoy myself. As I was reaching climax my mother burst through the door, having heard the noise, raving and screaming. This could have been the end of it, but oh no. She dragged me ......
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