Nikkidiary's Topics (134)

I read this long ago, and had read this bit by bit. After it was retranslated, I reread it, but as it was making me feel sad, seeing Tama's life and Uchiumi's misery and the situation between them, I felt that I was not ready to read it all.
Today, I decided to put it aside, and drink the tea that comes with the cake. Take in the bitter, not just the sweet.

I realized just how much sweeter it all ended up after taking in the bitter parts of the story - his being detatched, remaining unable to trust anyone, not belonging anywhere, and cannot sincerely dedicate his heart to any person, not even Uchiumi.

After the catalyst that is the meeting with his brother and the truth about his past, he realized that there is a person who willingly accepted everything about him, including that which he was not willing to let anyone see. I suppose that was when he decided to put his trust in Uchiumi and desire to love him... although this time, and understandably so, Uchiumi is the one who tries to clear things off, hoping all the best for him.

I think that at the last part before their reunion, he had decided right then that after protecting himself from the harshness of the cold and lonely winter that is his life, false warmth isn't going to give him anymore fulfillment, not after experiencing the genuine blaze of flames from Uchiumi. He had decided right then, after cleaning things up, that the thing that had been restraining him was not necessarily his past, nor his troublesome lovers or clients, but himself. Perhaps, by being with Uchiumi, he would be freer than he ever was; in fact, he probably wouldn't mind being bound if it's by Uchiumi.

He shed his protective layers and decided to fully believe that now, he will no longer be alone. Now, he has someone he genuinely wants to be with; someone he wants to bring happiness to, and be happy with for the rest of his life.
His hair is cut, the cat ears are removed, and his name is revealed: Tama the stray cat has finally found a place where he can finally be a human.

The last time I saw this was when there were only a few chapters (black witches meeting) so I was pleasantly surprised that there were a lot of chapters.

It's sadder than I expected it to be, but the lighthearted moments and sparks of hope and joy (and occasional silliness) make it so it's not just sadness or tragedy. When coming across these things I futiley try to think of how things could have been different, what might be changed of fixed, what can be helped... but of course, their story has followed its written path, the thread is spun and the die is cast. But even amidst a thorny path, as repeated by several characters, they still managed to find their own happiness, and like a fairytale, they reunited in a field of flowers, at peace and in contentment.

The only thing is that Luna is the one left to bear the pain, as someone who holds onto the memories even if everyone else forgets or disappears. I truly do hope that her future can be happier and that the world will someday be a kinder place towards her and Lis. On that note, I'm grateful about the fact that Lis didn't completely forget things, including his love, because it's also such an important part of him.

I can't help but feel nervous about the future thanks to the overwhelming force of the white witches and the power of the queen, not to mention the fact that Lis has to grow well as a magician and overcome his supposed destiny....
While I wish for happiness for Luna and the gang, considering that there were already a lot of deaths and a lot of sorrow, hope feels both sweet and cruel.

But of course, in the end, I am a spectator, and in this story it feels like one can only grasp as much happiness as they can, and that fate is generally unkind to our heroes. (Then again, Gakuen Alice was also like that... That's why I awaited the ending first before reading it after avoiding the story for a while, so I can spoil myself before getting more invested and attached. )
Not to mention, considering how things have gone, their "happiness" can be subjective. It might be happy to them but sad to me. Or it'll be bittersweet happiness after another bittersweet happiness.

Because anthologies are usually oneshots, I figured that this one would, be, too, and let down my guard.

...
Chapter 4 definitely should have a continuation out there somewhere because not even oneshots end like that! I've read that it's likely found on the other volumes, but I don't think it'll ever be translated or even seen...

It felt like a mad dash to the ending...
It was building up to something really big.
I mean, the confession happened, the truth of how the younger brother ended up in their clutches was revealed (it was nothing unexpected), and they're all happy, but... but I don't know, it's like the important parts were snipped - no, like an entire 5-10 pages were omitted!

Suddenly, Suzu is awake already, Hana appears to be working alongside him and with only a few words; we know that it's likely he decided to settle jn with Suzu's family, not even a moment with explanations, or at least a nice meeting with the rest of his family, just like how Suzu got acquainted with Hana's, or even any details regarding said "deal" and how or why it was resolved in a single chapter when it's been the main conflict...

Well, at the end all I can say at this point is at least it's great that everything is resolved. Suzu got his brother back, Hana is with Suzu, and Hana's family visits from time to time. Maybe there'll be a short extra, maybe there won't be.

I know he is basically irredeemable - he destroyed lives and performed unscruplous acts, and he genuinely does not care or love...but I felt a sort of pity for that black shadow guy, especially during his final moments. Considering what he did, he would not deserve pity, nor does he need it... but despite my hate for what he did, and what he was, I couldn't help but feel sorry, anyway... (likely because I'm a reader who has a soft spot for lonely people...) I hope that when he was erased from this world, he will be reborn again as a proper character who will know love, everything he wasn't before. Perhaps then, he will finally be fulfilled and free. I'm happy that most of the characters we came to know had their happy endings, and the most important thing is that they were somehow able to achieve the impossible - bringing a fictional character into the real world, and making him real enough to stay.

I kind of wish I could see a short extra detailing the lives of those 3 - I mean the no-good trio. There's likely a possibility that their lives are all similar to Kagami's, hence why they're rather skewed (like that one time in the fireworks festival, when Kagami tells them off and they make it sound like that's a main feature in their friendship. They appear to know what normal friendship is, but at the same time they like treating their "friend" like this as well, thinking it's all good.) I guess the leader is the type who was lonely yet refuses to be pathetic, so someone else has to be the receptacle of his dissatisfaction. Refusing to be abandoned, so he's the one who doesn't cling, and doesn't show affection. Maybe he grew up in that environment, seeing someone who clings, and someone who abandons, so he decided, "I'm not going to be like this". Seeing someone so willing to give everything to him, and in the same muddy situation, feels less lonely, even if it's empty... hence why he can never fully be rid of loneliness, as Kagami observed later on. Buuuut this is all just speculation...

While this already feels complete, and it is, I feel like there can also be a potential volume 2, because there's possibilities to explore - like Kagami's parents, How the two friends are going to act towards Kagami (would they be awkward? Feel betrayed? Try to joke a little, like before? Etc...), and their future together. High school sometimes feels a little incomplete in settings like these, after all.

I'm just kind of surprised that not one person overheard that conversation, or saw what was going on, in spite of the place being crowded.
Then again, it's either people were super drunk or chose to turn a blind eye because it's their well-respected sunbae. The sunbae probably made sure that the only ones at the table are these types (because some people didn't like him and some people appeared to believe in Ba-Da), and the two allies he had were gone because one was too drunk and unrestrained, and the other had to go and stop her.

With the promise of tomorrow, they walk forward... separately.

Like a lot of the readers, I was pretty disappointed. I felt like the secretary strung me along, too. I understand that it can't always be a happy ending with rainbows and flowers, but I was hoping that both of them would move forward hand in hand, because they were still special to each other even as one suffers unrequited love and the other burdened with deep wounds from a previous relationship. To be frank, I felt dissatisfied, not just that they didn't end up together, but also that their problems from the beginning persisted up until the end: there's still unrequited love, and there's still the haunting past. But if the last chapter was anything to go by, they may have just moved forward and taken their first step again, albeit separately. (Of course it still makes me sad!!!)

I may be a hopeless romantic, but I think that "dilemma" of the mom may still give them an opportunity to meet and collaborate. They may not end up together, but they might still work together sometimes - who knows, maybe the overly capable former secretary can run a restaurant properly with President Mo, whose hobby is cooking, occasionally.

Maybe, given time, they can become friends, and Xiao, having finally confided the truth to people (his mom and the president), can breathe easier, and perhaps start his journey to healing, probably. Not forget, not replace, not erase his past love, but at the very least, there's a glimpse of hope in someday healing. At the end of the day, they won't be working together anymore, maybe they'll find other people to be with, but I think President Mo will be a different kind of special, irreplacable person to him as well.

If the story is meant to end like this, then the curtains have fallen. Unlike a promise of love, or a promise of a future together, this is more like a simple, bittersweet promise of tomorrow for both of them.


...but yeah, I wish I read the comments first and spared myself of pain. This little comment of mine is a little salve, a balm, a consolation for the wound I got from my expectations of "the" happy ending. I didn't want to be prejudiced for or against the story so I skipped comments, but this is one of the times I wish I read comments first.

I know this is such a small thing in contrast to the depth of the story and emotions, but I'd like to give a special mention to the merman's fins and tail. Especially the fins. I like how they swoosh and flap around when he's excited or energetic, it's so cute!

I was surprised to see that there were more of those dolls; it must be pretty hard for the hero to remember all their names in a day even if he named them all.

Oliver - green-haired, green-eyed doll who's always with Hugo. Appears to be a general asssistant in the home. Seems to be a little more energetic than Hugo.
Hugo - black-haired, dark eyed doll who's always with Oliver. Appears to be a general asssistant in the home. Seems to be a little more reserved than Oliver.
Cookie - white haired doll with distinctly darker skin. Prototype, so he doesn't speak as much as the others (although we haven't heard the two others speak yet.) Cooks food.
Flona - Blonde haired doll. In charge of "groundskeeping".
Paprika - Red haired doll. In charge of laundry.

Considering how happy Oliver and Hugo seem to be with their names, and how much they anticipated Guster to name everyone else, I think it's safe to presume that the other dolls are also pretty pleased upon receiving names. (And headpats)