beta
i think i get some of shin's feelings on this. like obviously not to this extreme but it's like when you meet someone and get close to them, bonding over being losers or lacking something or whatever, and then it turns out they're not like you at all. you showed how much you suck and you thought you'd seen it from them too but you didn't. they never belonged on the bottom at all. not like you do.
it makes you feel betrayed because it's like all those moments you spent together thinking you were on an equal playing field are shattered. you were never in their league, you were never even meant to be in their atmosphere. and then comes this anger because it feels like they mislead you, like they lied (in this case Jay actually did). you bond over being poor only to go home with them and discover they have money. you bond over having a shitty family only to find out their family is lovely. you bond over having no friends, only to see they have plenty. it feels like being betrayed, and it hurts. because you thought they understood you. you thought you understood them. but you never really did and that sucks. it makes all the things you shared feel fake, even if it was real. because it doesn't matter after that. you bared your rotten soul and they never really did.
i don't blame him for feeling betrayed or being pissed and never wanting to see him again. he'd live life near the bottom, a place jay never actually was at all. he thought they understood eachother but that all became shattered and i personally would NEVER trust that man again because that's actually humiliating to be the only one not in on the 'joke.' to treat it like it's real the whole time just for it to be one big scheme you weren't a part of. to discover you were never on a equal playing field at all. to find out the man you were willing to fall to hell for was never there at all.
obviously i hope they make up im just saying i get why he's so pissed and betrayed.