This argument/fight was bound to happen. Going back to the start of their relationship, you have a teen alpha who suddenly found his fated mate. Seems great? Not really. Looking back, you have a TEENAGER finding his fated mate after being insecure about his 2nd gender for years. Until then, Hazuki hadn't been all into playing the role of an alpha bc of his past experiences and suddenly, finding his fated mate, he wants to fill that protective and reliable alpha role. He pushed himself to mature (and it's been explicitly said so by Naoto as well that he(N) feels that Hazuki is more mature than him despite his age). Hazuki wanted to be someone who protected and cared for his new family, pushing himself to do his best. That's great and all, but he was young and didn't have the same experiences as Naoto so he was always playing a catch up game in terms of experience. His lack of experience and perceived capabilities - especially when Minato came along - really showed compared to Naoto and Hazuki had to deal with those insecurities that came with feeling like he cannot protect or help. We saw him hide and withdraw because he felt that he was being a bad partner and parent by being unable to even hold his baby. They were able to temporarily patch up (not fix entirely) the issue then because Naoto got through Hazuki's insecurities by explaining his previous lack of knowledge and own insecurities about being a single teen parent. Great, but Hazuki still struggles with this gap between him and Naoto. After that they seem fine, and they are okay because they can communicate and help each other out. However, Minato is growing and he's reached the age where he is being a little rebel. Hazuki isn't prepared, they now also have a third child to care for, and that gap is apparent again. Adding to this insecurity, is the fact that Hazuki is not trusting Naoto by doubting if Naoto would stay with him if he found someone more reliable. Naoto of course wouldn't but Hazuki believes that his perceived lack of ability to help Naoto will push him away and that Naoto would find it easy to move on from him. At this moment, things are made worse bc Otoha (if I remember his name right) is good with kids - one of the biggest failings for Hazuki. Hazuki needs to read books and blogs and learn from other parents, but this guy? He appears to be a natural with kids. What Hazuki doesn't see however, is that Otoha most likely has had years of experience with kids, so of course he knows a lot. However, Hazuki's insecurities and his jealousy and his lowering confidence in himself is building up. And in this new chapter we see him blow up - which is something new because he's tried to hide when he feels insecure before - at hearing Naoto compliment someone else on something he has been struggling with. It's not good and I get what he was trying to say, but he did not say anything good. He ended up victim blaming, which of course hurt Naoto because 1) it was a terrible traumatic time for him and 2) Naoto most likely feels betrayed by Hazuki who once told him that he loved him for who he was and would not look down on him for being an Omega. Naoto has been told repeatedly that omega are at fault for whatever happens to them, but Hazuki was different and based on his reaction, Naoto feels a deep anger towards Hazuki now because he used those feelings and experiences against him. I know they're going to work through this, but it is also true that this was bound to happen. Hazuki isn't a bad partner or parent, he always puts his family first and is an active parent. He's never left Naoto to deal with the kids alone on purpose and he takes on doing chores and childcare actively. Naoto, and others, are amazed by how hard Hazuki works to take care of his family while learning to take over his mother's company. In this chapter, Naoto and Shizuku are excited to prepare a surprise birthday for him and there are no negative comments about him napping because they believe he deserves to rest. Naoto was probably even bragging about how good Hazuki is to him. Everyone sees it but Hazuki. He wakes up and immediately scolds himself for napping when he was only supposed to put Aoi to sleep, he worries about not giving Naoto or his mother in law resting time. He believes he should be able to give others rest when he himself needs it, and he sees it as a failure not to do so. He's just really insecure, and honestly I get that. He feels he isn't living up to his role and that he is not being a good parent or partner because of it, when he is already a great parent and partner. He's young, younger than Naoto, so of course he doesn't have all the experience and knowledge that Naoto does and he isn't giving himself grace. He is seeing himself as a failure but at the same time he doesn't want to admit it and he's burst out now, saying the wrong things and taking his frustration of himself out on Naoto.
Poor Shizuku, she left with her parents happily together and will return to them having fought. She's definitely going to be hurt by that. I just hope this fight doesn't last too long, my heart can't take it. ╥﹏╥
Poor Shizuku, she left with her parents happily together and will return to them having fought. She's definitely going to be hurt by that. I just hope this fight doesn't last too long, my heart can't take it. ╥﹏╥
2024-04-03 17:31 marked
Armchair psychology time ig