
It's still hard to imagine who is the top who is the bottom....in Hams previous relationship he seems like to be the top...still confused

actually i dont, im here for their relationship development not their sex life; i read shounen ai for the plot and slow burn and the fluffiest that is missing in most yaois; also even if i do think about their sex life, i never go as far as to assign a position for them bc 1) most gay men in rl dont stick to one thing 2) you deciding who does what is mostly based on some weird assumption/stereotype youve learned from reading yaoi 3) i really dont give a shit who tops/bottoms in yaois so why would i care in shounen ai

Fetishizing lmao. Fetishizing means sexualizing someone/something by stereotypes associated with them before seeing them as people. I don’t do this though? I think about fictional characters in a sexual context, and I would do the same for wlw or mlm or straight pairings. It’s not ALL I think about, though? I care about them as characters but lmao why can’t I fantasize about them sexually just because you don’t. Both shounen ai and yaoi are NOWHERE near an accurate representation of mlm relationships irl. I’m assuming you read both or either of them. As long as you understand that real mlm relationships are not like this, and understand that you should never push these stereotypes on real people, I don’t think you’re doing a grave sin. I do agree that it is easy to fetishize mlm relationships, especially by reading yaoi/shounen ai, but just because I think about a shounen ai couple in a sexual context does not mean I’m fetishizing them.
Somehow reading this makes me so happy gives a cute soft feeling....but sad at the same time thinking about the situations I live in I mean they're not bad, but I want to live my life like Nora once (▰˘◡˘▰)
Fully agree with you. I get an melancholic feeling reading this.