Jp VA: Uchiyama Kouki though I also find his voice really soothing, so there's some bias there. Otherwise, Yūto Uemura, if only for this https://youtu.be/3q-L2sIfvg8?si=4CHrTCEypmOXmUM4
Eng VA: Zeno Robinson (especially in his roles as Hawks in BnHA, otherwise he's prone to playing goofier characters with less overt hotness). Also Alecs Lee (Viv...... reply
As another gay dude reading yaoi, I think about this a lot. My understanding is it largely has to do with myths about masculinity.
Most yaoi back in the day run with common understandings of toxic masculinity, such as that men are inherently horny, hypersexual beings and that their love must always come with a sexual component ("you know you're in...... 3 reply