I'm not sure because I completely understand how you feel but maybe it's because a lot of yaoi has this type of plot but it also took me a long time to get into the one I actually tried to read it multiple times before just recently reading it fully
Yes, but this isn't a fluffy story , it is very graphic and contains a lot of rape and mental abuse , it is not supposed to be fluffy.
I know. I've read a few things like this the first one that comes to mind is Color Recipe which also contains rape and manipulation and graphic stuff. It's kinda like this but it is in a modern setting ya know?
I don't hate this , ofcourse it's sad and I am devastated but this story isn't happy , do you think his love will redeem all the past times he raped him ? So why is everyone losing their shit , he raped him once and that's it he isn't good from the start.