message me. I can be your ate :)
it was long but not complicated
the only advice i can give is that you two should meet and talk about it and then either you will be besties again or you will drifted but the good point is that you will be sure. personnally i prefer empty my bag (if it's how we say it )
Lol , loli we r kind of same .
Well my advice 4 u is , u should tell her what u have felt when she was with that A person . Coz i have a felling that when u tell her this she will fell happy to know that her best friend cares about there friendship . Then this might remove the awkwardness
b twen u 2 . :-)
Well I have a different perspective. I had plenty of experience with friends and best friends, in some cases, they were the ones to drift away first and in others, I was the one to drift away first.
The scenario which you've described happened to me before, and more than once. At the time, I was mad but as I gained more experience, and maybe a more in-depth understanding of what was happening, I realized that most relationships go through transition phases. Friendships end, old flames weaken but at the same time new friendships and flames are born each and every day.
I can, without fear of being wrong, tell you grosso modo what was happening in your best friend's mind. I don't think she intended to harm you or hurt you but sometimes friends and even boyfriends are overwhelmed by new people they meet. They are not intentionally set to drift away from their current best friends, or girlfriend if we're talking about a BF/GF situation, they just discover a new level of comfort and fun or a different level of comfort and fun which they haven't experienced before. Without realizing it they downgrade the status of their old friends (from best friend to friend or from a friend to an acquaintance) and in some cases they upgrade it when the circumstantial situation ends (I said "in some cases" because sometimes the downgrade move is permanent).
Should you confront her about it? Well it depends on you. Personally, I think that it is not necessary if there are hints which make you understand how she is thinking. As for the part of being mad or holding a grudge, that's wrong. Your situation has happened million of times; in the future, you might be the one to drift away first. Hence, you should be more flexible and albeit it is necessary to have a particular person in whom you confide but you should never depend for your well-being on one friend or best friend, socialize as much as you can, make friends as much as you can. The completely two opposite persons is just a chimera because if things which differentiate them are put aside, and they start to converse with each other from scratch, it will turn out that there are more things which bring them together than those which separate them ⁄(⁄ ⁄·⁄ω⁄·⁄ ⁄)⁄
Had to go through this multiple times with old friends where it's awkward af to talk to them even though we've used to be "besties". Over time I learned about friendship is that, most of them will end at some point or will drift away from what they used to be. But in the end, the thing that doesn't change is that at some point their friendship made you happy, and yours' made them happy. Even if you both make new friends, it doesn't change your past.
But unlike me, you still want to be close to your friend as before. You should invite her to hang out or go to the movies go do something you guys used to do. Also I don't think you should hold a grudge against her for leaving you, from your story I don't think she did it to intentionally hurt you. Whatever you decide to do, I hope it goes well for you! (●'◡'●)ﾉ
thanks a lot guys, it took me a while to reply to this. I was feeling really confused and i didnt want to accept what was happening. Well im a coward so i havent said anything yet, but i do plan on talking about this with her when i feel comfortable enough with this topic. Anyway it feels like we arent as close or as carefree as before but were still damn close. And thanks for all your inputs it helped me.
well to tell you somethings people say i have a resting bitch face (lol its funny) and the fact i dont really like hanging out with anybody most of the time (even besties) cause it drains me out super quickly, and im not one to be affectionate with words or physical touch cause its just weird for me :/. Well i'll tey to show her more that i do like her cause she might be feeling insecure, i dunno. Anyway seriously thanks for everything guys it really helped me :D.
anybody have time to tell me what they think? Cause im having a problem right now, im gonna tell you now that this is gonna be long so if you dont want extra emotional baggage or problems then skip this.
Okay, so ive had this best friend for awhile we were total opposites, she was the girly girl and i was the geeky Manga obssessed one. Even tho we have almost different perspectives in the things we like & hate we still were able to be best friends.
Then one day we decided to go to a china tour trip. We were with a bunch of other people, one of those people was like my best friend (she'll be dubbed person A), girly, shop-a-holic, fashonista, etc. so they got a long together really well. They were like best friends. My best friend only came to me when she needed something but most of the time she was with person A. Tbh i was mad that she ditched me for another, she knew i was mad but i dont think she knows why.
So after that we were back in school since person A lives far from us they could only chat.
And then the tables were reversed. I met person B who was really like me, we think alike, we both like manga & yaoi, since i was still feeling a bit angry at my Best friend i decided to get close to person B, she was cool and i wanted best friend to feel even a little sad, i didnt see any problem with it since i really liked person B. Two birds with one stone.
My best friend acted the same as usual when that happened but the new awkwardness was there, she told me that she trusted me more than her close friend 1 through chat. We slowly drifted, but we still say things like youre my best friend even though im not sure if its true anymore.
Please tell me your opinions, i really want it to go back where we would be close together but i still have a grudge that she would ditch me for a person she hasnt even met for longer than a week.