spoilers :)

spoilers
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theres a series of misunderstandings. nocton is a complete tsundere. he doesn't know how to show love to the fl and he has a lot of trouble about how to treat her because he really wants to have a real relationship with her but is afraid that she is being influenced by his black magic. So the times he treats her badly, it was to break the effect of the magic, because he wasn't sure if she was under the influence or not from being so good to him. Nocton's black magic is quite peculiar bc if you say the name of the person you want to manipulate, the effects are greater than saying their last name or some other title. For this reason, Nocton always called her Valrose, so that in the case of controlling her, the effects on her are little, despite the fact that she insisted that he call her by her name. When Roa got engaged, he still wanted to do things right so they could have a true relationship, but there were times when he didn't hesitate to brainwash her into just loving him and then repenting. He doubts too much about how to treat her because he yearns for true love, he does not want to hurt her by manipulating her but the emotions control him. Roa is a dense person but from a young age she was also in love with Nocton. And Nocton, he was already in love with her too, but too many conflicts for wanting a true relationship with her and being afraid of manipulating her. But he wasn't afraid to use his powers when Roa's engagement to Aaron was confirmed because he didn't want her to be with anyone else. In the end they end up together and have a daughter.