Same I feel the tightness too and I feel like I’m gonna barf. And I keep reading to see if Dora even tried to redeem himself or if he gets with kakeru. But it’s unlikely
That tightness exists because we know Taiyou is completely helpless. He hates what's happening to him but is completely powerless to stop it and it's been going on for so long that the rape has become normal. He can't say no and when he does, his seme just laughs and finds pleasure in the act. There's no love here and there's never going to be. I think the seme is confusing possession with love too. And we all want Taiyou to just say fuck you and walk away forever. But he doesn't and he won't and it sucks.
This is fucked up. I feel a tightness in my chest when I read this manga, I don't even care about the sex scenes, I can't think about them. At first I was like "Woooow obsessive rapist seme, alright, okay I see where you're going with this" but it was much worse than anything I had anticipated. It just keeps getting worse I can't - The more I read this manga the more I keep thinking "When is it gonna stop?" "When is it going to get better for Taiyo?" "When is he going to be happy" but every chapter just gets more and more fucked up. I like it, it's not a bad manga, it's done really well, I can tell by the way I am connecting and sympathizing with the characters. Like I can't explain the what I'm feeling when I read this manga, but the feeling grows with every chapter... "When? When? When? When?" I guess I'm just used to things simply working themselves out in these mangas and always having a happy end.... That's why I keep wondering when things are going to get better....