I feel this in every way, I went thru the same stuff. Plus, I've watched Anime since I was 2 and took up Japanese classes on the side to become fluent, since I pretty much knew the language, and it was like I was some kind of demon or something when ppl found out like, it's not weird at all to be interested in things, especially within the POC community, but both our own communities and others oppress any differences besides the ones society puts on us to begin with
I really relate to your story a lot. I sorta have an inferiority complex at times when I'm surrounded by other black ppl. I don't necessarily talk or act the same way or even have the same interests.
I really admire the ppl who can truly fit in with the culture and I don't feel 'cool' enough to talk to them, so I isolated myself and now in college, I don't have any black friends. I really want to, but I just get anxious.
And trying to hang out with other races other than white ppl is just impossible because they are just like us with that cultural barrier.
Hopefully we can find more people just like us :)
I am black and growing up I never felt black enough.
I always talked proper (how I was raised) and I always had stereotypically non-black interests. I liked anime, rock music, Kpop, etc. And I was far from outspoken. And i almost always went to majority non-black schools. So when I went to a high school with more black ppl in it, I was happy. But I wasn’t accepted. I was called things like Oreo and was told by even non-black students that acted too white. I felt like I wasn’t enough. Anyways, I noticed that this is a common trend with minorities. When your a POC, people expect you to act a certain way. You’re not allowed to be an individual with different interests. White Americans are allowed to like what ever they want and other white ppl aren’t questioning their “whiteness” because of it. I think this habit of ppl invalidating someone’s ties to their culture because of their individuality needs to stop. Regardless of race or ethnicity we are individuals who like different things.