Yeah, and of course they could both work on communication, but I feel as though Duna kind of tried to talk to Minho originally and he just brushed her off. She maybe should have tried harder, but I can't imagine being in a situation where your partner doesn't even want to disclose to others that you're in a relationship would be good for your self-esteem. She probably gave up because she wasn't confident enough to try again and cheated to spite him instead. You have to have confidence to effectively communicate and unfortunately I don't think either of them have a lot of that
I think that cheating is pretty cowardly, actually. To have the wrath and cowardice to spite your significant other by having sex with another person rather than to grow a pair and have the tough conversation? She was throwing a temper tantrum. Duna loved Minho and so desperately wanted a regular relationship with him, but he squandered her affections in pretty much every way possible. She probably felt so detached from her relationship with Minho, it was easier to have sex with another man than to fix or end her relationship directly. They both lack the confidence in themselves to behave like adults, so they throw fits and get angry over things that they could easily fix with a conversation.
I never thought of it that way I appreciate the new perspective. I always figured cheating was just a matter of being dishonest but after thinking about it the dishonesty is caused by cowardice. So yeah they were both being dishonest and did not properly respect each other.
In Minho's case his cowardice is one of his major character flaws.
Not sure if you've ever seen Donnie Darko, but it's one of my favorite movies. In the movie there's a lot of discussion on how our actions and feelings lie on a scale between love and fear. Sometimes we act in fear, sometimes love, sometimes somewhere in the middle. I thought this was very applicable to this scenario. Both of them have a cowardice that stems from fear. Fear of rejection? Fear of others' opinions? Psychological analysis is always so fun. I'm glad we had this conversation :)
I haven't seen Donnie Darko but I have heard that our actions and feelings lie on a scale between love and fear somewhere. I think a important lesson both Minho and Duna need to learn is that ultimately their emotions come from within and it doesn't matter whose fault it is they are upset because their emotions are still their own responsibility.
Minho doesn't seem to understand that the whole reason Duna cheated in the first place was because the way he mistreated and ignored her made it like they weren't really even dating. She couldn't even say they were in a relationship because he didn't want anyone to know. SIR IF YOU WANT YOUR PARTNER TO STAY YOU HAVE TO TREAT THEM WELL.
Not saying it was ok for Duna to up and cheat like that, but I can't say that I don't know why she did it or what she was thinking. With a relationship like what they I had, I guess I wouldn't even be sure if there was anyone I needed to break up with before I started a new relationship lmao