RespeK

I'm the eldest, and believe me it doesn't hurt at all ╮(￣▽￣)╭ I'm pretty mean but we're pretty direct. And I think a healthy dose of reality is much better then deception. And Julia is obsessed and mad at the fact that she doesn "own" Ginger.She doesn't love him ,maybe she once did but what she's going right now is ignore reality and forcing her expectations and emotions on others. The big brother did the right thing. But I don't think she's gonna stop, as I said it's not a misunderstanding on her side ( her believing Ginger still loves her), she's obsessed on a very unhealthy level. And honestly if my sister did that she'd have an 8 hour long what we call "charla" which is anywhere from a normal conversation to woRd war of passive-agressveness.

I think it hurts if you hurt them

But if they learn and grow from "the hurt" I caused them with a reality check then I think it's worth it

It may be worth it as an experience but that can be learned easily just by talking. They can be scarred and it will probably stick with them.

That is true, but I think if you can justify as you converse why are you being so harsh, it softens the fall(?).And just to be clear I never meant physically hitting them. And I'm not mentally abusing them either, often we think the reality is too harsh and you sugar-coat things, or just not talk about them.But i think this world is a survival game and if you don't know the rules, you'll never get where you want to be. So it's like my way to express my care and affection for them by educating my siblings on what's waiting for them, it's not a fairytale nor is it hell,it's somewhere in the middle. I'm just letting them know that half assness will take them nowhere, and being toxic to themselves or others is in no way ok.

Oh yea. I was talking about emotionally hurting them but I meant it more like you unintentionally do it sometimes like in anger or something. So it sometimes hurts you too in the long run.