He wanted to end the relationship with MD for this guy? Are you ok? Are we reading the same thing?
Consent impacted by conditions is no consent at all....
It's clear you don't understand BDSM. BDSM is about satisfaction of BOTH parties, safety and full consent. And it wasn't fulfiled at all.
No i never said the word 'wanted' i said he was 'Ready to'. As he said maintaining both relationships could meant END for the arrangments with MD. He and the other guy were going to talk with MD, so that mean they need MD's opinion about even maintaining their BDSM plays right? SO that means that The other guy's part was already assumed. For Chanwoo the other guy would stay, it was decided that he would stay. unlikely relationship with MD cause basically that talk would decide whether he could continiue their relationship or not cause with the other guy Chanwoo was going to have a relaionship. So That's why i said he was ready to. Never said he ''wanted'' to.
How can you say that when basically whenever the safe word was said MD immediately ended the play. Don't you know what safe word is? Like bruh it's exactly for maintaining safety. There was no moment in that play where MD crossed the lines or did something that is off BDSM limits.
The consent was impacted by conditions which already is unavailable. Sub felt Obligated not to use safe word and refuse because of conditions. It's clear manipulation. The whole proposition was proposed after he was in fragile mental state after being rejected and used by his new bf. MD took total advantage of that.
I’m not sure if you’re aware, but, healthy bdsm usually is when 2 people discuss their play BEFORE they do it and make sure their partner knows and consents. The safe word is an extra protective counter, it is unsafe to just do whatever and hope your mentally-unstable and abused partner will say the safe word.
Person's mental and psychological state is something else and saying stuff out loud is totally another thing. Let's say if i hated MD but was manipulated to write this comment, would you ever think that i hate MD? No. cause my comment says something else right. Other people judge and create impressions of another people by words and actions, because no one is able to read other's minds. I think same goes here. MD acknowledged that Chanwoo was in bad mental state ONLY when he said the safe word. Chanwoo could have said No from the start but again as we saw here he doesn't want to lose that relationship with MD. In the end based on your comment it sounds like the manipulator and the topic of manipulation were the same, both were MD. So your comment has a contradiction there.
Okay then why didn't Chanwoo discuss it before he got naked and wore bondages and sat down in front of MD. It's clear that it was his decision but somehow you guys are only wanting to see MD's fault in all this. Im Sure MD didn't kidnap Chanwoo or took him to his house and forced to get naked and all. He basically and clearly said he didn't have to do this if he didn't want to and he could even go home, but it was grown up Chanwoo who decided to stay there and do it cause he generally enjoys doing BDSM play with MD.
And ofc wanted to maintain their sexual relationship.
Why is Chanwoo in charge of discussion when MD is more experienced in bdsm while Chanwoo is not? Why is Chanwoo in charge of discussion for consent when he is not the one who will be inflicting pain/sexual act? You trying to one-sidedly place the blame on Chanwoo while defending MD, an experienced dom, says a lot.
What does experience has to do with it? You said yourself that “2 people discuss their play BEFORE they do“ Does discussion have someone in charge? So you're saying MD should be in charge? why? Discussion is something between two people they should be EQUALLY in charge and decide. And nope im NOT AT all putting blame one-sidedly on Chanwoo. It's just im answering your blames about MD. no one really asked me the question '' In the end who you think the blame is on?'' cause different from many of you i can also discuss the case of Moral fault of doing revenge in MD's case. But it doesn't go further than people's view of morality. In BDSM part i think MD never did something that is off he play's limits.
MD is a DOM. HE IS LITERALLY THE POSITION IN CONTROL DURING THE PLAY. He needs to initiate the discussion because Chanwoo, an abuse victim, does not know about the ‘rules’ to BDSM because he is inexperienced. Yes, discussion is involving two people, but if one doesn’t know about the discussion’s existence, who is supposed to inform them? Don’t forget, MD is the one who invited Chanwoo to be his sub and to be on his channel.
Ok. I don't understand your comment it doesn't make much sense. MD knew Chanwoo and his situation for longer time. He is not some stranger. He saw bruises etc. He saw how uncomfortable Chanwoo acted thorough the newest play, how he asked if he really had to that etc. And his smirks.. please let's not play dumb.
First of all stop screaming cause that's not how civilized discussion works if you're gonna teach me about it. lol. Secondly, Chanwoo is an abuse victim not because of MD but as far as we know from some asshole he kept seeing on regardless that they were beating him. He is not a victim in relationship with MD and their contract was based on two grown up men's decision. Rn for me i don't really have any wish or time left to keep up with replying. Good luck
Trauma from abuse isn’t exclusive to relationships; they carry. Also, it is physically impossible for me scream, this is a typed chat. Thank you for coming to my ted talk.
Everyone in comments saying how they are disappointed about MD and how they hate him, but I don't hate MD at all. First of all Chanwoo could have said NO from the start if he didn't want to participate with another sub in this kind of play. But No, he didn't say it because he didn't want to lose his relationship with MD. But what about in previous chapters where he was ready to end this relationship with MD for that guy. Why isn't he ending it now? To me in this case it seemed like MD was in Chanwoo's reserve that he was ready to throw away. But when that guy betrayed him, he has no one but MD left for his sexual desires, so he doesn't want to lose him (if the other sub didn't betray, Chanwoo's relationship with MD would be already be finished by Chanwoo himself). Secondly, I think many of you don't understand what BDSM play means and how it works. Tbh as a play, im just saying, in Chanwoo's case MD didn't go further than blowjob. Plus when Chanwoo said the Safe word, he immediatelly stopped the play. Yes, i also DID felt heartbroken when i saw Chanwoo's tears, but let's not forget to point out that he started to cry when he saw MD kissing the other sub and felt jealous. I think he just realized that he has some feelings towards MD other than sexual attraction. So as i said, i don't hate neither of them, neither MD or Chanwoo at all.