Ask me anything about BDSM!

Squibbles May 24, 2020 5:10 pm

Since there have been so many comics with... Quite unrealistic depictions of BDSM, I thought I could start an AMA here in case people have some questions. Have something you always wanted to know about BDSM/kinky relationships but never had the courage to ask? Saw something in a yaoi and wondered whether it's realistic or happens in real life? Go ahead and ask here!

For reference, I'm a bisexual Dom with around 10 years experience in BDSM and kinky sex and I'm very passionate about safe, sane and consensual BDSM :) I'm pretty confident I've seen it all, or at least most of it haha

Feel free to ask ^^

Responses
    aroomsthepotato January 21, 2021 10:08 am

    hmmm, I was wondering how safewords are used when the sub cant speak.... is it hand gestures or something.... how do doms look out for that??

    Squibbles January 21, 2021 4:56 pm
    hmmm, I was wondering how safewords are used when the sub cant speak.... is it hand gestures or something.... how do doms look out for that?? aroomsthepotato

    Gestures usually, or sounds like snapping fingers ^^

    aroomsthepotato January 21, 2021 5:51 pm
    Gestures usually, or sounds like snapping fingers ^^ Squibbles

    Interesting :00
    I kinda always wonder xD

    aninha January 22, 2021 3:35 am

    half a year later LMAO

    starss April 4, 2021 1:25 pm

    is it not awkward after? ksbdkd

    Squibbles April 4, 2021 4:11 pm
    is it not awkward after? ksbdkd starss

    No. We usually just cuddle and talk for a bit

    starss April 4, 2021 11:38 pm
    No. We usually just cuddle and talk for a bit Squibbles

    Aww wait thats cute

    _soyuki_ April 28, 2021 8:45 pm

    Hello :3 thank you for sharing your knowledge, I read the answers and they were all very interesting and well-written. I wanted to ask how you actually enter the BDSM world, for example, how you can meet people with the same interests as yours? And also, is there something you would raccomend or warn to someone new to BDSM? Thank you (◍•ᴗ•◍)

    Squibbles April 29, 2021 9:12 am
    Hello :3 thank you for sharing your knowledge, I read the answers and they were all very interesting and well-written. I wanted to ask how you actually enter the BDSM world, for example, how you can meet people... _soyuki_

    There are usually local groups and organizations that arrange gatherings and parties you can attend if you're interested. Just google your city and BDSM and you might find some local organization. There are also online groups on Facebook etc. where you can find likeminded people.

    When you're new to the scene, especially if you're a sub, be vigilant about your limits. BDSM communities are often very welcoming and don't stand for any kind of abuse, but there are Doms who specifically prey on new subs because they're easy to control and abuse. When someone approaches you, be firm with your limits and if the Dom tries to negotiate or gives off vibes, trust your gut instinct. You're allowed to reject people and say no without owing an explanation why.

    _soyuki_ April 29, 2021 10:35 am
    There are usually local groups and organizations that arrange gatherings and parties you can attend if you're interested. Just google your city and BDSM and you might find some local organization. There are als... Squibbles

    Ok, thank you! :)

    ferri May 11, 2021 9:17 pm

    I hope this question isn’t too weird or something like that. I always wondered if people who are into less common things (like scat) are frowned upon/not accepted as much in the BDSM community. I hope that made sense.

    Squibbles May 12, 2021 3:58 pm
    I hope this question isn’t too weird or something like that. I always wondered if people who are into less common things (like scat) are frowned upon/not accepted as much in the BDSM community. I hope that ma... ferri

    In general, so long as you're not into anything illegal, people have a live and let live kind of mentality. It's more of a "I personally find this very gross but you do you" -kind of attitude.

    ferri May 12, 2021 9:12 pm
    In general, so long as you're not into anything illegal, people have a live and let live kind of mentality. It's more of a "I personally find this very gross but you do you" -kind of attitude. Squibbles

    Oh, ok. Thank you for the reply!

    Tsura Sobasa May 23, 2021 6:29 pm
    Great questions! ^^Amount of partners: "Normal" is quite relative, it entirely depends on what the people involved agree on :) But as a general observation, I've noticed that poly relationships are a bit more c... Squibbles

    So sub-drop is really a thing? I actually though that was a fictional thing made solely for the Dom/Sub-verse... Σ(  ̄□ ̄||) Can you please tell me more about it? ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

    Cat May 25, 2021 2:23 am

    Hello! Thank you very much for making this session and letting us ask you questions!!

    I hope this doesn't sound unpleasant or anything but I was wondering if people actually lick people's ass... I don't mind vaginas and penises but the ass isn't really attractive to me haha... I don't know if I'm just picky
    And do you perhaps know how to make the ass smell better? Lol I don't know if it's possible. It's not that it smells gross, but it's not that good, you know...
    I hope this made sense
    Thanks in advance!!

    Squibbles May 25, 2021 10:36 am
    So sub-drop is really a thing? I actually though that was a fictional thing made solely for the Dom/Sub-verse... Σ(  ̄□ ̄||) Can you please tell me more about it? ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶ Tsura Sobasa

    Yes, it's a real thing. When you have really intense sex, your endorphines (chemicals in your brain that make you feel good) increase drastically. Afterwards, when they return to normal, many people experience a drop in mood because the contrast is so stark which can manifest as feelings of guilt, depression or loneliness. It's important for the Dom to be present and offer affirmation and comfort

    Squibbles May 25, 2021 10:38 am
    Hello! Thank you very much for making this session and letting us ask you questions!!I hope this doesn't sound unpleasant or anything but I was wondering if people actually lick people's ass... I don't mind vag... Cat

    Yes, some people like doing that. Not all do which is okay, it's fine not to be into something. Maintaining normal hygiene and washing it before intercourse is usually enough to eliminate issues with odour.

    Tsura Sobasa May 25, 2021 5:11 pm
    Yes, it's a real thing. When you have really intense sex, your endorphines (chemicals in your brain that make you feel good) increase drastically. Afterwards, when they return to normal, many people experience ... Squibbles

    thank you so much for the information!!! ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

    _n_u June 5, 2021 6:29 am

    it is always abt sex and can it be without sex included?

    Tsura Sobasa June 5, 2021 12:01 pm
    it is always abt sex and can it be without sex included? _n_u

    you mean penetration, right? since bdsm and all sexy things are sex too in my opinion.