You left me a deep impression on your confession tbh and somehow you just give me the courage to look into life in a good way and somehow im really proud of you, knowing how hard and difficult it is to change oneself but slowly bit by bit you are doing everything very well to achieve what you are today ..... And I'm sorry for your lose but I just hope that whenever you lost your hope you can still get it back, just don't give up . And I believe you can overcome everything on your way since you have come this far already and if you ever need a good listener, I'll be there. Thank for sharing your story
I was the same way - I never left the house. It was for...fuck, it was so long. Too long. It started when I was about 12-13? My parents stopped going to church and I stopped pretending I had good friends. I was homeschooled so I never had a reason to leave. I just...stayed home. It was bad growing up. My siblings bullied and abused me, but it was worse when they left. There's nothing more scarring than an empty house... I stayed alone like that for a couple years. Somehow, by the time I got the end of highschool, I knew I would die if I didn't change. I dug deep into my suicidal, depressed self and I went to therapy. I learned how to drive. I hated everything. I wanted to die everyday that I tried to change myself. It was so fucking painful. Eventually tho, it paid off. I gave up on therapy a year in and I really shouldn't have, but I was strong enough to go to college. I was able to slowly build up social skills and I met my girlfriend. I'd definitely have died if not for her and my brother. Those two just....held me together long enough for me to teach myself how to be human. I'm still with my girlfriend, but I lost my brother to suicide 3 months ago. I'll never get over it. He was my other half, my soulmate. To lose someone is a unique pain that even years of isolation can't compare to...