So after all the comments about Jihyun, I thought his portrayal would be somewhat sympathe...

DreamChaser October 27, 2019 6:23 am

So after all the comments about Jihyun, I thought his portrayal would be somewhat sympathetic, but he's basically a textbook abuser? And I know that gets said a LOT about characters, but I think the author might have literally made a checklist using Why Does He Do That? or something. Which is honestly kinda a teachable moment, so here we go:

* Always shifts the blame onto the victim in the relationship
* Asks why the victim is "making" the abuser hurt them, assault them or belittle them and implies they'll stop if the victim just behaves the way they want
* "Gaslighting," or acting like the victim is being emotional or irrational over legitimate issues
* Angry or violent outbursts when the victim tries to put distance between them, resist, or establish boundaries
* Isolates the victim and destroys their chances of making friends
* Gets irrationally jealous
* Makes the victim live in fear of upsetting them because they don't know the consequences
* Manipulates the victim using public pressure or fear of "causing a scene" (like when Jihyun kneels in school to "apologize," even though Chiwoo says he doesn't want that).
* Apologizes after outbursts but never actually changes their behaviour
* Alternates between "lovebombing," where they tell the victim how much they love them, treat them well and/or act like they're really regretting what they've done, then go back to assaulting, belittling, or beating their partner in cycles

NOTE: It's fiction. If Jihyun's hot to you or you like him as a character, that's fine. He's not real. Just understand that this is classic abusive behaviour, learn to keep an eye out for these signs, and don't ever justify this kind of thing IRL.

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