Oooooh, okay...

I’ve just reread the entire manhwa again and I fiiiiinally understand what’s going on hahaha my gawd these babies are so difficult haha
Youngwon’s overall goal and desire is actually quite simple and kinda innocent lol it’s so painfully obvious that Haemin’s rejection and giving up actually hurts my heart. Like I physically feel pain .°(ಗдಗ。)°.
For those who don’t want to get spoiled don’t read further than this...
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For those who’d like to read my opinion on the matter, keep going haha
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Ok
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To understand Youngwon, we really need to look into his character, his family, and his previous relationship with his ex. He’s a rich mans son, is privileged, and well off. This gives him overall confidence that people just naturally gravitate to him for his wealth but also overall good looks. However, he’s actually quite conservative, innocent, and shy.
If you read between the lines, his relationship with his ex was sincere (at least on his part) but he was betrayed to find out that the relationship was only one-sided and he was being used because of his wealth. He felt totally betrayed and I believe that as we go on and get to know Youngwon, we’ll find that because of this, it has made him very reserved and defensive when it comes to love. We can understand this because as “rumors go” Youngwon actually left for a year after he had the bad fall out with his ex... and then comes back the next year... to essentially bump into Haemin. Now, because of he is still hurt by his ex, this makes him more weary of giving his heart freely (as expected after a bad relationship)... Now... instinctively he wants someone to love him for him and he wants to verify this... so he becomes overall more cunning (at least that is what he tries to go for, showing off confidence to hide his overall insecurities and his shyness). He doesn’t ever want to be vulnerable and wants to maintain distance so that he doesn’t get hurt... but also he wants love in the relationship.
This is where Haemin comes in.
Youngwon, the cute little cinnamon roll that he is, actually fell in love with Haemin at first glance! (When Haemin bumps into him trying to find the freshmen opening ceremony.) After that, they bump into each other a few times (Youngwon, intentionally doing so) ... however, Haemin has no recollection of this and doesn’t give Youngwon any attention. This not only hurts Youngwon’s pride, he becomes a bit obsessed... especially when he realizes Haemin’s “hobby” of taking pictures (of him). This only instigate a play of hard to get from both sides...
Now during their actual relationship, Youngwon has these preconceptions of Haemin, based off of his observations of him and his recent interactions. He thinks based off of his character that he knows, he’s easy to tease and has a predictable streak... and his innocence and naïveté make Youngwon believe that he is quite dense... thus, he deems that because he fell for him first, Haemin can’t possibly like him back as much as he, therefore, he wants to make sure that before he even allows a confession that Haemin has completely and utterly and irresistibly falls head over heels in love with him.
What Youngwon doesn’t know, is that Haemin isn’t as dense or naive as he thought, and has actually honestly fallen for him... almost to the point of equality having an obsession. Also, he didn’t understand his character or personality as he’d first thought...
Even though Haemin is shy and not that outspoken, he is actually very solid and clear. He knows who he is and what he wants and is actually very confident. He’s shy but not easily swayed by others. We get to see this clearly in relation with other people in college. Whether is popular or invisible, he’s not easily swayed by peer pressure or attention, and he speaks his mind clearly. He has a few close friends that he can trust and speaks to and that’s fine with him. He actually is very confident in his personal identity and that’s what Youngwon doesn’t realize.
This only becomes slightly apparent to him during their intimacy where Youngwon is surprised by how subjective and sure of himself Haemin is (in bed). But that’s because he was never embarrassed about his inexperience... and once he got experience, well... of course that let loose the beast haha
Anyway, throughout there entire relationship (thus far) Haemin thinks that Youngwon is playing hard to get or that he sincerely just doesn’t like him and is just using him... but in actuality, Youngwon is fighting an internal battle. On the surface, he has a plan and wants to stick with it, to play hard to get and to make Haemin so madly in love that he looses all sense and can’t think of anyone else... but in actuality, the intensity of Haemin’s love is making his mask/farce break... revealing (at glimpses) how shy, vulnerable, and easily embarrassed Youngwon can be to TRUE affection. Youngwon is overcome by this and whenever he feels too much he vanished (ignores) Haemin for some time. Of course this makes Haemin confused and he thinks Youngwon doesn’t like it. But I actuality, Youngwon is very sensitive about giving his heart and actually scared about being hurt again... but also yearns to give in at certain times (we can see this a little when he “accidentally” confesses during intercourse), but of course he pulls back before he his farce can break.
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Anyway, that’s my overall summary based on reading it all again. Honestly, it really makes sense when you think about it. Haemin hasn’t been in any other relationships before and hasn’t been used before (except for - what he thinks - is happening in their relationship), therefore there is a disconnect between them.
Youngwon is a very complicated character (one of the reasons why after rereading it I fell in love with him) and IS manipulative but ALSO kinda stupid about love... which makes him a cute cinnamon roll that needs to be protected.
Which is why, it hurt so much when Haemin decided to give up and just not take themselves seriously... when Youngwon heard this... he couldn’t believe it at first and then once he confirmed that Haemin was serious, his heart actually felt pain. Which brings us to now, where he confesses in desperation... and struggles unsure whether Haemin will believe him or not.（/TДT)/
Rn I just want this misunderstanding to be settled and that both these babies be happy! That’s what I want. That all I want!
I’m sure we’ll get a bio of Youngwon’ character and perhaps some flashbacks about this ex... I’m guessing - hoping that someone will shed some light over our very complicated baby! He’s just hurt and wants love from the person he fell for at first glance. It was honestly Haemin’s smile during their first meet that did all this! Seriously! My heart can’t take this anymore!
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Well, that’s all I got about my theories... there actually some more based on their interactions and such but I think I’ve covered the most important ones. Yeah. Anyway, the next chapter should be good!
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