This is insane.
He CONSCIOUSLY beat Seungtaek, he consciously bullied his cousin, consciously beat Kyubin because he was jealous of his relationship with Seungtaek. He did it to make other people feel as weak and as worthless as he did on the inside. He said this himself. So why are you coming up with some fake diagnosis that completely contradicts what the author wrote? This fanfic that you Inbeom fans write is really disturbing because you’re all just pulling shit from your ass to justify why you don’t want to hold him accountable for his action. This is how parents raise a rotten kid they deflect blame and insist they're just a sweet poor kid and other people should just treat them better.
All of these boys come from a troubled home in one way or another. Kyubin literally lost his entire immediate family and didn’t go around assaulting people. Inbeom is not a good person and needs to learn how to better channel his rage and feelings of inadequacy/abandonment. He needs more than “a little therapy”. Don’t try to minimize what he did to Seungtaek, that was targeted and repeated assault.
Well written.
Reaction formations are not a diagnosis they are a type of defense mechanism that all people can and do use. They perfectly explain inbeom's pattern of destructive behavior towards himself and the person that he liked. I thought it would be interesting for people to know that it is a real psychological phenomenon that has a name. The fact that Inbeom's behavior actually aligns well with a heavily studied pattern of human behavior, in my opinion, only shows how great the writer is. Because instead of making him generically violent and not attempting to uncover the unconscious reasons for his violence, they created a very nuanced and accurate portrayal of a troubled teenager. He behaves the way that many real people also behave. The idea of boys picking on the girls they like or homophobes actually being closeted comes from Freudian theories such as this. This theory explains why people like inbeom self sabotage, namely because they never developed good coping strategies for feelings of sadness or shame, etc. Some people like Kyubin do have those coping strategies and so even after intense feelings (i.e the grief of losing one's family) they don't lash out.
Therapy teaches people how to develop those strategies. For inbeom's case he could talk about feeling embarrassed that he was seen crying and a therapist could help him work through that to learn that it is okay for him to feel and to express his emotions, and that doing so doesn't make one seem weak. He would learn to accept himself and not feel the shame and not feel the need to show seungtaek and the world that he doesn't cry, doesn't feel, and by extension isn't weak. His aggression towards seungtaek stemmed from a place of self preservation when there was no need for him to feel threatened in the first place. Also it's " a little therapy" because it can be surprising how effective early interventions can be in a short amount of time especially in a young person without any comorbid mental illnesses.
If you don't think therapy was a good solution for inbeom's self hatred and aggressive compensatory behaviors what is the solution? As you said in therapy he could learn how to channel his rage and feelings of inadequacy (or better yet release him from them) by teaching him better coping strategies.
Inbeom has shown a great capacity for kindness and a desire for love and friendship. He could be taught to correct his behavior and actually receive those things. I don't think having the life nearly beaten out of him is the best way to do that. Saying that inbeom didn't deserve the terrible things that happened to him doesn't mean I'm justifying the terrible things he did. It means that I don't believe violence should beget more violence. It's okay to have compassion for people who have done bad things and it's okay to want them to help them become better people.
It’s become a common trend for people to focus more on what Inbeom ‘doesn’t” deserve, rather than find out WHY he did what he did. The major focus was always on how badly Seungtaek beat him up ( even though Inbeom beat him just as badly) and how sad it is that he lost his memories.
I definitely agree with you that compassion is necessary but compassion shouldn’t be mistaken for enabling. Also when I said “ more than a little”, I said so in response to your wording that seemed to have brushed off how severe his issues are that lead him to assaulting his classmate. He needs ongoing therapy to deal with his abandonment and internalized homophobia. A singular friendship does show his potential to change, but we also have to keep in mind that Seunghee never posed a threat to Inbeom. Seungtaek and his own cousin Suhyeok triggered his feelings of worthlessness, so how can we truly know he has changed? I don’t hate this character though, he’s an interesting one and a type of character I like to read. I just wish the reading of him wasn’t shallowed by enabling fans blaming everyone but Inbeom for the issues he caused.
Obviously because this is a manhwa, it’s not that serious especially because it’s a more lighthearted one. But kids like Inbeom need structure just as much as they need compassion. The fact that he has no one to correct him and instill positive values is a part of his struggle with abandonment. He pushes and pushes his recklessness to assert the fact that he is alone and worthless and no one cares enough to push him to be better. It’s self-inflicting pain.
Inbeom didn't deserve what happened to him. He just really needed a little therapy.
"This type of behavior is usually compulsive – it is difficult for a person to control. The intrinsic need of the ego to protect itself and prevent others from seeing and experiencing what they are really feeling comes from a place of self-preservation rather than one of dishonesty. The reaction formation behavior can become obsessive, with the individual becoming argumentative and defensive if challenged or questioned.
Reaction formation as a defense mechanism is an unconscious reaction as opposed to a conscious response. An impulsive reaction can be hard to control as compared to a measured and considered response at the best of times. There are many factors at play — a person’s identity or their sense of self, their feelings of acceptance within their community and their overall self-esteem."
https://www.depressionalliance.org/reaction-formation/
He's a poor sweet sad boy and no one should hurt him anymore. (and yes he shouldn't hurt anyone else either ╥﹏╥)