Responses
I think Cole was suicidal and on the verge of ending his life. Always alone and just existing. That's why it was hard for him at the begining to accept that he has a dreamy boyfriend that loves him. That was the reason he had a gun. He thought he was not good enough to be loved be someone like that (cause Alex was not just good looking but also very secure and open-minded). But don't hate the Uke. If you live 20 years alone and treated like nothing and people make fun of you it is not easy to love yourself or trust easily. You always compare and find your self lacking
Actually, the story could even go by itself without the gun tho. #-.-)