Yikes, this hit too close to home. Lately I’ve started questioning a lot what are my own...

Itzarit June 19, 2019 8:05 pm

Yikes, this hit too close to home. Lately I’ve started questioning a lot what are my own feelings and what is the heteronormativity that was ingrained in me growing up.
There's a strong part of me that feels the only way I will be happy is if I settle for being straight, marry a man, and make a family, but how much of that is what I really want? Do I even like men, or am I just programmed by media and society into thinking that I need to be with one to be happy? I don't know lmao, and it's really stressing me out. Ever since I realized I might not be attracted to men at all I don't even enjoy yaoi as much as I used to because it just lost appeal somehow. Ah. What a mess.

Edit: it's probably inappropriate to vent about these things so randomly but I don't have anyone to talk about these kinds of things and it's stressing me out lol

Responses
    marcia June 19, 2019 4:01 am

    You should ask yourself,..."have I ever liked the same gender" and if your answer is yes you might be lesbian!

    But if theres a chance that you like boys ALSO you might be bisexual (which mean you like male and female) !
    You might be confused about you sexuality because all this yaoi stuff

    Itzarit June 19, 2019 8:03 pm
    You should ask yourself,..."have I ever liked the same gender" and if your answer is yes you might be lesbian! But if theres a chance that you like boys ALSO you might be bisexual (which mean you like male and ... marcia

    Yes, I’ve noticed that for girls I like all of them & men it rarely happens so usually I give it more importance because there's an ingrained feeling in me that liking men is superior (probably internalized misogyny), but I’ve never wanted to actually date the men I liked, so I'm wondering if I just confused a feeling of admiration or just liking their physical appearance for attraction? I don't even know what liking someone means anymore, and I'm terrified by the thought I might be a full lesbian instead of bisexual, because that could get problematic later on, but!! I'm not gonna let it keep stressing me out lmao It's not like I plan to date anytime soon, anyways. I can figure it out with time.

    kalen June 19, 2019 8:54 pm
    Yes, I’ve noticed that for girls I like all of them & men it rarely happens so usually I give it more importance because there's an ingrained feeling in me that liking men is superior (probably internaliz... Itzarit

    but then have you ever wanted to date the girls you like?

    Amorim June 20, 2019 8:16 am
    Yes, I’ve noticed that for girls I like all of them & men it rarely happens so usually I give it more importance because there's an ingrained feeling in me that liking men is superior (probably internaliz... Itzarit

    Honestly I feel like liking someone is a pretty simple concept. It burns inside you and you always want to see them and be around them and thinking about them and a future with them. Do you feel that way towards men or women? Both? Just because you "like" a lot of girls doesn't necessarily mean those feelings are as profound as the ones you have for the men that are few and far between. If you dont feel that way towards either gender, maybe you're asexual. I like a lot of women. I love being around them and spending time with them and laughing and cuddling and I can see that they are physically attractive. But it's just not the dreamy, wanting to be near feeling I get with a man and though I rarely find that feeling with a guy, its incomparable to the platonic feelings I have towards women and Male friends that I'm not in love with. Dont overthink it too much with the whole "was I programmed to be this way". Just see how you feel and try going out with a boy or girl you think you may like and see which one gives you that "love" feeling

    Gragill June 21, 2019 5:36 am

    Simple. Stop thinking about society and norms or whatever, and start thinking with your pussy and heart. Experiment in a club or something to figure out your sexuality, and once you know it, just meet new people and if fates let's you, get romantically involved. It's not worth stressing out about such a personal thing that is supposed to come naturally.

    breakfastwithsatan June 22, 2019 10:20 am
    Yes, I’ve noticed that for girls I like all of them & men it rarely happens so usually I give it more importance because there's an ingrained feeling in me that liking men is superior (probably internaliz... Itzarit

    wow I sometimes feel the same, the way you described it felt like you took the words from my mouth, it freaks me out if I think about it too much so I tend to just sort of ignore it and if I ever fall for someone then I'll know

    missotaku June 22, 2019 4:36 pm

    I like how u all think is so simple but it ain't true when u have oppressing society and planned marriage

    missotaku June 22, 2019 4:38 pm
    I like how u all think is so simple but it ain't true when u have oppressing society and planned marriage missotaku

    Specially if ur like the same sex or like neither

    key June 22, 2019 10:43 pm
    Yes, I’ve noticed that for girls I like all of them & men it rarely happens so usually I give it more importance because there's an ingrained feeling in me that liking men is superior (probably internaliz... Itzarit

    I realized what my sexuality really was after first thinking I was straight but then started realize I was also attracted to girls. Afterwards after being more acceptable about it all K made out with guys and girls but while doing that I realized that with guys it just feels disgusting and I keep staring at anything else not feeling any pleasure of the moment. While with girls it was different. It might be just a bi phase when one is more attracted to one sec for a period or not. I'm still not sure