There are certain things that can't be allowed, you need to set boundaries. A lot of men abusing children really think that the children are ok with it. When you talk about comics os one thing, but in real life things are different.
Twenty years seem like too much to me too, in my country it would be eighteen, but I don't think you should use the example of your country as good practice. Fourteen years old dating other fourteen years old is fine, but if they are dating adults is a whole different thing.
I just think it's so not logical. People are considered adults in usa or korea at their 20s, in spain or in slavic countries at 14-16. Do teens in usa or korea more stupid so they have same mental level at 20 as slavic kids in their 14? Of course not. Or why person will get "trauma" from having sex before, as example, 2 days before their birthday when they reach age of content? What 2 days, weeks, month will change? But other person life will be ruined even if sex was fully mutual. Those laws don't protect kids from sex violence at all and even make everything worse.
I don't know about slavic countries but in Spain it is at 18. And the problem is not only to be in mutual love or not, one person who is 14 years old saying that he or she is in love with someone who is 28, for example, could have serious issues behind. For example psicological manipulation, economical need or several types of fear. When there is a huge age gap and one of them is a minor most of the times it is not due to love, but to other issues. Law comes there to protect the weak, even if they can be disturbing very few of them who are genuinely in love. But if they really love each other they shouldn't have problems waiting, sex is not everithing in a relationship.
Than I'm wrong about age of content in Spain, I followed info from wikipedia. Probably it's old.
I'm from Ukraine, I lived when I was kid in Russia and Czech.
Most of my classmates, include me, at our 11-18s where only into old guys with at least 20 years age gap. Boys our age were dorks, arrogant, unpleasant, not gentle or sensitive. Older guys were considered mature, nice, experienced, interesteting, sexy. It was a huge trauma for all of us when older man saw us unattracting, not sexy and so on. I was taking orders to draw my friend with her crush (ussually actor at his 40s) with her having sex. I could draw quite well and doing so made me popular among my girl classmates.
I can say for sure from fan sites of some actors or singers that they have lot's of teen girl fans, who find they sexy. Here were a question how ald are fugeshies and many answered that they are around 11-13. It's not like in my time or in my country interest in sex was smth special at that age.
We were speaking about sex and played like dolls have sex when we where 6 or 7 years old.
It's adults who have some trauma from sex abuse projecting their fears on healthy kids and teens. I feel a lot of judgment towards those adults.
I can say for sure that 30-40 years women would be in same position. Problem is not the age, but the way women and kids in general treated from their early childhood. Kids from the start have less rights and often get scolded for saying "no". It's started from small subjects until they afraid to show any disagreement with adults.
btw 15 years old person is not an idiot. With access of the internet and unlimited info teens are now much wiser than adults.
What bad consequences would occur if girl would have sex with older person ( man or woman) with this conditions:
- she know how to say what she likes and dislikes
- she only agree to have protected sex
- she have knowledge of safety, cuz condom isn't everything.
- she checked other person for aggression and sure that he/she will not do anything against her will?
- she showed to other person that her friend know where she is and with whom.
I was in some swing clubs and I can say for sure, woman any age don't know basics of sex safety, don't feel enough courage to insist on their wills. Most "decent" housewives have way more problems with venereal infections ( not deadly, but unpleasant) then who have promiscuous life. Second category of women do usually tests for 10-15 infections every year or half year. First one never do it. It's because all that subject were taboo for half of their life. After reaching legal age of content people just got thrown in adult life without actual knowledge of basic survival skills in society.
I agree with most of what you said, except with 30 to 40 year olds.
Also let me clarify. My statement was in general. See not everyone has access to internet, and not everyone has the same experiences or cultural/religious restraints. Women might be still virgins until whatever age, but the decision, the certainty of the idea that their choices make would most likely have a strong or weak impact on their lives is much more clear for 30 to 40 year olds, than in younger women. See, as we age, we learn a lot, and how our decisions affect our daily lives. It's true, even if it's not by our personal experiences, but from our friends'.
So going back to your first paragraph, you cannot say "for sure," unless this topic is what you are working on, or what you specialize in. Personal experiences cannot be generalized and general statements (especially about age) are not applicable, except when you clarify the context.
Cheers! P.S. I'm enjoying these types of conversations.
age of consent exists to protect children from predators and pedophiles who are very very very real. if age of consent did not exist, children who were raped will have an even harder time trying to prove they were raped in court. and do you know how excruciating it is to have to tell your rape story line by line, repeatedly in court? age of consent laws protect children from child marriages too which is frustratingly still legal where i live. you have just been very lucky but pls don’t be tone deaf to the ones who need laws to protect them. adults should never see kids and teenagers as potential partners in the first place. it’s wild to be angry about a law that protects children just bc you want the freedom to have sex with an adult it’s important to remember that the world doesn’t revolve around only you and that child rape is very very real and is still happening to millions of children today. how can you be angry at a law that protects children? be for real
It's always look like nonsense when couple with age gap are waiting for one of them reach age of consent. They both ready for sex but afraid that government will not approve their relationship. They just have been brainwashed and moral is not the case. For me specific it's even more crazy when I see that they waiting when younger guy reach 20. In my country many people already have 2 kids by this age. Many 14 year are old dating seriously.