this, I can relate. because I too have friends that in name only. I know at the end of the day, when it comes to me or them, it's gonna be them. that's why it's better to have a no strings attached thing, yes you can have friends but remember not all those you think are good friends thinks the same as you. stop crying and keep your head up. it's no use crying over those who does not care about you, frankly. continue your life as usual, and then maybe you'll find someone else worth calling a friend. and it'll be grand.
I feel you when I was in junior high school I thought I was like a "filler" friend. Just a friend there who sits and when I talk it seems like they weren't listening or interested. I distanced myself from them and learned to find peace and contentment even when I'm alone. I'm a strong independent woman I dont need people who are toxic in my life. Now even when I'm alone i don't mind it, I even feel comfortable about it. It doesn't hurt like it used to at least.
I dunno, i know i dont have that bright personality but still i always thought about them and did my best thinking about them. But today i realised im nothing to my friends.... worthless... just a friend in name.... lol feeling funny u know..... sry to rant here... but i really wanna cry shit ... ╥﹏╥