Am I the only one that thinks this way?? Am I sick to think this way??

You are noy insane, but that is not a healthy way of thinking because you saying to someone you love that if you are ever gone they shouldn't be happy with another person (as you said he could relieve sexual frustration but that would be only physical, but what about his mental health?), I would strongly reccomend going to a psychologist to see why you are thinking in that particular way as the peson you would marry is the person you are supposed to love the most.

I believe that in the spirit world earthly relationships will lose all their relevance, in losing our corporeal bodies and our material possessions. Otherwise, what's the point of leaving your body if you're still keeping all the things you had physical attachments to? It's like leaving a toxic relationship just to enter into another one that is with a different person but is just as toxic (shitty analogy, I tried). I don't know how your way of thinking makes you sick or insane; it just means you're a little paranoid. And that's okay. If you're in a relationship, these things probably won't matter to you nearly as much as they do now (maybe?).

If you're really that worried, think about it this way. A person can have many crushes and relationships until they find the one they want to marry/spend the rest of their life with. This, if we consider those only choosing monogamous relationships. I see that you are really spiritual, but to make the best out of your personal spirituality, and your peace of mind, I suggest not holding onto toxic paranoid feelings. So, let me get to my point. A person can have many crushes until one day they meet "the one". And if you're an idealist, then you know what I'm talking about, and you probably want this person to be your "Soulmate" or some equivalent to that. If you believe the person you chose is your soulmate, then it doesn't matter what relationships they get into after you're gone from the world. Just like the little relationships your partner would have had before they even met YOU (the Soulmate), they can still have those little relationships after, but no one would ever be the same as you (the Soulmate). Does it feel better already? So when you both join up again in the afterlife, it's clear that your Soulmate will put you above any other soul 'cause, like, you were made to complete each other. :) If you want my personal views for your comparison, I believe in both afterlife and reincarnations & soulmates. I think that in the grand scheme of things, your soulmate is the one you have the most profound love with. But.. love. Do love. Follow your heart, even if it chooses the wrong people sometimes, learn from your mistakes by knowing what you want instead, and keep following that heart, until you find the person you love so so so so much that you even wish they wouldn't be lonely if you died before them. Unconditional love is a thing that you learn through life experience, and it is the most powerful love out there.

So, if he dies first, you won't allow yourself to ever, ever love anyone, even a little bit, but will go out and have lots of sex with men you don't care about? That seems terribly lonely and sad. My cousin lost her husband, and is now in a new happy relationship, I do not see that as bad, and I am sure her late hubby is okay with her not being alone for the rest of her life.

Just give it a few more years and u would be over all these fairytails

I think it'll get better once you're in a relationship. You'll love them so much that you'll simply want them to be happy...... Never mind. I've never dated anyone so I don't know (●￣(ｴ)￣●)

If it were me, i wouldnt even want him to have physical relationships. But i dont even wanna get married so meh

Buddha itself! I'm currently reading a spiritual book and now I'm convinced the author quote you.

Haha really? I'm honored ヾ(☆▽☆)