you still have a long way to go and at the end also you may not find why life is so complicated, but i tell you from my own experience we have excessive population on earth and most of them are just idiots.
To be completely honest I have the same thought every now and then, even to the point where I did cut my wrist. The only difference is I don’t live for anyone but myself. Both of my parents technically have their own huge flaws never thinking the negative effects it gives me. But you see, I realized it’s very disrespectful and weak having negative, depressive thoughts just because the situation you are currently facing is not ideal.. Whatever the reason is you’re being emotional just suck it up and think that there are thousands of people in a worse situation than you are, who can’t even afford a phone, an internet access or is out in the cold streets, but then what? They are still trying to live strongly and you should too.
Ending your life is never a solution it like a manga that the author drops just when the story was getting good.
Hold on tight and don’t let go,sometimes life is a bumpy ride with ups and downs,turns and swirls happy moment,confusing moment,sad ones and boring ones when your going through it you feel like your going through a roller coaster,but when you look back,you won’t change much and you are a stronger person because of it and that you didn’t do so bad.
Just be the best you can be everything else will work it self out.
I keep thinking that i want to die but then my mom suddenly video called me and all my negatives thoughts are gone. She's the only reason why i keep living. I dont want to see her cry and hurt if i kill myself. I dont want to see her blame herself but im tired. Why living is so damn complicated?