It's lonely (long stuff because I really feel lifeless)

hypergargalesthesia January 16, 2018 9:26 am

Sigh~ I just want to share because it's really getting lonely. I used to have friends by common interest. When I was in high school, we keep on recommending books and manga to read and anime to watch. College life and we attended different universities. It was lonely during my freshmen year. No friends. I just read books during class, watch anime at dorm then repetitive cycle. When I was in third year, I discovered the joy in BL. That kept me for a year. I spent most of my hours reading manga BL. I wake up 2 AM just to read BL and go straight to school at 7. In other words, I only get 3 hrs of sleep everyday just to read BL. There are few BL novels I've read with depth and profoundness. Words of the authors that are well versed which itches a part of your chest. And I really wanted to tell my friends about these... but I can't.

I can't recommend any more novels/books/manga to my friends and neither can I accept their recommendations because I am held down by the fact that I read "BL". I am already having trouble reading 'normal' books. And it's lonely. I enjoy the company of my friends and it would have been greater if we enjoy the same things. It just feels lonely that I can't enjoy the same things they read, and it's lonelier that I can't share the joy I've felt with BL.

Responses
    Weiwei January 16, 2018 9:53 am

    i can understand

    otaku nerd January 16, 2018 10:11 am

    damm , i relate so much to that ,
    but my friends have always have different tastes to begin with , even songs , i no longer share with them , they sometimes laughed out how i hate shopping so much and prefer to read a manga ,

    maybe internet friends are present for that reason , but i can understand the void you r talking about , college is indeed hard for me too , and finding a similar manga person or otaku or even loving bl is nearly impossible , but i vent to interent i guess ?


    can i recommend you a manga i love so much ? BL
    golden days
    seven days

    it has the " itches part in your chest " you r talking about (๑•ㅂ•)و✧

    but im used to being lonely , honestly pushing myself too hard for interests that arent mine is EXHAUSTING ,do what you love , and find ppl on the way , you will find them ....i hope

    fightinggg(づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ

    hypergargalesthesia January 16, 2018 11:10 am
    i can understand Weiwei

    *bro fist*

    hypergargalesthesia January 16, 2018 11:12 am
    damm , i relate so much to that ,but my friends have always have different tastes to begin with , even songs , i no longer share with them , they sometimes laughed out how i hate shopping so much and prefer to ... @otaku nerd

    Thank you for these motivating words.
    I've already read them, by the way.

    Yes. I'll find people on my way. :) We will. (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ

    Yasii January 16, 2018 11:54 am

    you're not alone.. like i also really wanna post yaoi updates and some bl stuffs on my personal fb and ig but CAN't.

    Stop It. Get Some Help. January 16, 2018 12:39 pm

    Ah, it's like the opposite of me.
    I just attended college too, but in the college I got one friend who's fujoshi too in my class, but you know what?
    sometimes our taste are different you know what I'm sayin' She discovered yaoi one years ago, and me 6 years ago, so I'm more hardcore than her, maybe that's why lol
    So I just hope you can find your friends that you looking for soon.

    Gohan007 January 16, 2018 1:59 pm

    i feel the same all people are not same and some feel prejudice against it so i keep it to myself but i can be afree bird in this site can express my views too