The overall vibe of the story works—the characters are likable, and it makes you want to keep reading. But there's a fundamental issue with how the plot is structured. There are major inconsistencies.
For example, when the three main characters are attacked, the girl comments that the guards were doing their job just fine, so it doesn’t make sense that the enemy managed to get in so easily. And yet, they defeat them without much effort. You start wondering: how is it possible that such a large number of enemies made it into an inner room of the castle, while the perimeter guards seemingly let it happen? There were no major casualties or defensive breaches in the castle, they just move to the next room, and life goes on as usual. At the same time, these supposedly skilled and stealthy enemies are defeated ridiculously easily. If this is the kind of threat the protagonists are dealing with, it’s hard to take it seriously.
Then there’s the king. He’s gradually turning into a dog, which should be a frustrating and terrifying experience. But instead, he’s always calm, peaceful, and even smiling—almost as if he enjoys it. In fact, it’s even hinted that he does like this transformation. It just doesn’t feel believable.
Lastly, there’s an issue with how the girl's motivations are explained. She doesn’t want to marry or go to the empire, but the reasoning behind it lacks coherence and depth. Even if you pay close attention to the explanations, you never really understand what she’s so afraid of. It’s vaguely stated that if her past life is discovered, she’d be arrested and her family would be in danger—but why? There’s no clear reason given for why this would happen. This vague, almost unfounded fear drives her actions, yet it’s never fully justified. Similarly, she goes out of her way to hide the fact that she already knows certain characters from her past life. She’s constantly trying to keep this secret, worried she might slip up—yet at the same time, she acts surprisingly relaxed around them. She doesn’t behave like someone who truly fears for her life on a daily basis.
The overall vibe of the story works—the characters are likable, and it makes you want to keep reading. But there's a fundamental issue with how the plot is structured. There are major inconsistencies.
For example, when the three main characters are attacked, the girl comments that the guards were doing their job just fine, so it doesn’t make sense that the enemy managed to get in so easily. And yet, they defeat them without much effort. You start wondering: how is it possible that such a large number of enemies made it into an inner room of the castle, while the perimeter guards seemingly let it happen? There were no major casualties or defensive breaches in the castle, they just move to the next room, and life goes on as usual. At the same time, these supposedly skilled and stealthy enemies are defeated ridiculously easily. If this is the kind of threat the protagonists are dealing with, it’s hard to take it seriously.
Then there’s the king. He’s gradually turning into a dog, which should be a frustrating and terrifying experience. But instead, he’s always calm, peaceful, and even smiling—almost as if he enjoys it. In fact, it’s even hinted that he does like this transformation. It just doesn’t feel believable.
Lastly, there’s an issue with how the girl's motivations are explained. She doesn’t want to marry or go to the empire, but the reasoning behind it lacks coherence and depth. Even if you pay close attention to the explanations, you never really understand what she’s so afraid of. It’s vaguely stated that if her past life is discovered, she’d be arrested and her family would be in danger—but why? There’s no clear reason given for why this would happen. This vague, almost unfounded fear drives her actions, yet it’s never fully justified. Similarly, she goes out of her way to hide the fact that she already knows certain characters from her past life. She’s constantly trying to keep this secret, worried she might slip up—yet at the same time, she acts surprisingly relaxed around them. She doesn’t behave like someone who truly fears for her life on a daily basis.