Omg legit I hate that in every single bl they say that , and how sex always sparks a relationship authors make it worse by having the bottom say it’s pleasure but they don’t want it in a way solidifying the whole “well your body likes it” or making the the character blush and moan like crazy when it’s rape , which is sadly in like every bl ( even the backstories ) when scenes like that come up I’m expecting for the person to turn blue and look like they want to die instead of a euphoric look that authors love to display . In a way promoting this as love and normal
Part of it is fantasy and part of it is just plain rape apologia.
I recommend this video to explain the fantasy aspect of it (it’s very long I know LOL but it’s a worthwhile, fun, and interesting video essay to watch). https://youtu.be/bqloPw5wp48
BUT tl;dr in a *PURELY* fantastical sense, for some people (women in particular I believe) the idea of being “forced” to orgasm or “forcing” someone to orgasm can be psychologically stimulating. It’s a way to play with certain power dynamics/control but it can also be like, a way to absolve one’s self of being responsible for their own pleasure/for enjoying a sexual act—why it’s prominent amongst women in particular being because women are often shamed for being sexual beings or participating in sex in any capacity, and so one way to cope with that can be imagining a scenario where she’s an “unwilling” participant being “forced” to enjoy sex that she Most Definitely Does Not Want wink wink nudge nudge. At least that’s one explanation. Obviously since BL is BL the bottom is substituted for the woman here lol.
The other part is yeah just plain rape apologia. Part of me also wants to say it’s also bad sex ed that doesn’t teach people that obviously just because someone physically reacts to something doesn’t mean they actually like what’s happening, and I’m sure that’s true, but it feels like a shit ass excuse. The idea that non-consensual sexual actions against someone can’t *really* be rape/sexual assault if they orgasm from it, or even that forcing someone (especially women) into sex is the natural order of things since they can occasionally orgasm from it, therefore it’s not bad…it’s all to excuse and perpetuate rape culture. And it’s a really awful myth to perpetuate, people struggle with being raped/SAed as is, I can’t imagine having to sit with the idea that you “enjoyed” it as well…
As a woman myself, and completely uninterested in real sex, I kind of understand the first part. There's something interesting about "losing control", which is something I personally hold dear for myself. But still, I'm not sure I'd be able to accept or consent to anything similar because of so many reasons that have mainly to do with self-respect, dignity and mental state.
On the second part, I sadly totally agree. Even more so that's a topic that should be spoken about in education. I'm not a victim of SA myself so I can't fully understand, but the mere thought of it happening to me gives me the creeps and I'm sure I'd never be able to recover from it unless my mind went blank and forgot about it all. Which could not happened, based on how easily I remember traumas.
I'd know for a fact I didn't enjoy the experience, and having my body react to it would make me feel so dirty and like I lost all sense of self... I can't even begin to imagine how it feels to end up pregnant after such a violence. That has to be even worse...
I'll never understand why people, mainly men I'd say, always seem to think that because the body is reacting the owner of said body must be "liking it".
Touching sensitive areas will always bring the reactions they were made for. It doesn't mean that your heart is on par with your body's desires. It doesn't work like this, and I never understood why it's considered a thing instead.