okay rant time yall

I refuse to watch this awesome story which had a solid start and captured me with its intriguing characters and mind-blowing art go down the misunderstandings path the way it is. I want to see Gunner in jail, along with his boss 'K' or whatever and the director guy out of the picture as soon as possible.

And MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE:

I want Theo to tell Dylan what the fuck really went down and I want him to be proactive about this what with him being a lawyer and everything. He should know how to separate his bygone sentiments for Gunner and recognize the assault he perpetrated on him in real-time.

I know he is a tough guy, a working professional who knows what he's about but much like everyone he is imperfect, if yall have noticed, he's the kind of guy who refuses to share his problems with others until he is persistently probed about it, and which is why I believe the road to true reconciliation between him and Dylan is gonna be long, protracted, and winding. I say 'true' cause for the time being Theo may spit a white lie and put on a mask to show Dylan that "everything's fine no big deal" all the while shutting down Dylan's deeper feelings along with it - because Theo figures he is not in a position to accept them because of how unstable he is right now with the whole Gunner thing.

In a way he's pushing Dylan away cause 'it would be better to not get emotionally attached for the both of them' and keep things as purely business cause it will get complicated and they'll both get hurt if this isn't "nipped in the bud" as Theo himself put. He's looking out for Dylan, as much as he is protecting himself.

[I honestly wanna say this to Theo: Ah, you think too much Mr. Ju. Just fall in love with ya lover boy Dylan - because he is already head over heels for you, wagging his golden retriever tail. Why do you insist on denying yourself of that pure love after all that toxic manipulative emotional abuse from that piece of shit you call your ex. Have a hot make out session with Dylan, everything is going to be ok, I promise. :3]

I'm also pretty sure he will go so far as to tell himself that he's a big boy and being older than Dylan he should be able to handle his own problems...but Gunner, or for that matter K and the entire drug racket that's been running for years now - is not something he can solve on his own. And it would be better if he realizes this sooner rather than later before things get out of hand...they're already messy as it is...

Meanwhile Dylan is no better than Theo at communicating. Here he is calling over his ex-fuck buddies and whoever else to put on a tantrum in front of Theo because he didn't show up at their mutually agreed upon time like an immature teenager - instead of asking what happened and why he didn't come cause he should've at least that much trust in Theo to inform him if he's being held up by work. Going completely incommunicado and not picking up calls should be raising flags of suspicion about something gone horribly wrong not just for Theo but anyone at all.

The readers know about Theo's relationship trauma (BUT DYLAN DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THEO), and how he perceives someone being 'clingy' in a relationship as emotional blackmail and manipulation because that's what Gunner left him with, how he broke and scarred him.

Compared to Dylan who is clingy but that's the way he shows affection, not to mention he himself is broken and grew up emotionally isolated and has his own abandonment issues (and Theo coming into his life was the most healing that's happened to him in a while, I believe, but again - THEO IS UNAWARE OF DYLAN'S TRAUMA).

It'll be tough for Theo to come clean to Dylan, obviously. But I strongly hope that he eventually does have a heart-to-heart talk with Dylan even if he takes a longer time to come around and say it and overcome his trust issues and that he too heals from the wrongs life has done him.

I hope they both heal actually. (and psychiatric therapy would be the quickest way to do that, but if therapy was a thing in drama fiction...none of us would be here reading this lol. i kid, of course.)

Even putting their arrangement aside, I want to believe that there is some level of emotional bond, or even simple curiosity about the other between Theo and Dylan which can translate into care and affection (maybe later on if not now), but whatever road they are headed down now is far away from that conclusion. I just hope the author does good on everything they have managed to build up until this point and not let the characters or plot regress into something that is less than what it had started as. Because I really fell in love with this manhwa in the beginning chapters and seeing it become just another average BL is my worst fear. I hope this nightmare of mine never sees the light of day. *praying*

P.S.: mom come pick me up im scared *starts sobbing*