Responses
May their pillow be warm on both sides and covered in drool.
May the stub their toe on every piece of furniture they walk by.
May their hair have a stubborn double cow lick every morning.
May all of their hot chocolate/tea/coffee always get cold before they are able to drink it.
May their new phone chargers always break after one use.
may every passing pigeon and seagull shit on you
may all your farts be sharts
may every packet of noodles you buy be broken
i hope you drive over nails
may your porch be iced over every single day this winter
i hope your wifi moves at a snails pace you absolute waste of air