Ik I felt like crying when I read his backstory it just felt raw and the guilt is something readers can relate to. I also feel like a lot of bl will put in a sad backstory JUST to excuse their toxic and or abusive actions but this one feels like I’m reading an actual character with valid reasons for the way he feels. While alot of characters mostly tops have a very toxic masculinity thing going on and almost act like they have no emotions and are just horny assholes. This one feels more realistic.Yeah the baby talk is pretty strange.
Exactly, very well said!! The characters here don't serve a trope (bad boy but sad backstory, so excuse his behavior) or the top who's only horny and doesn't show any other emotion other than anger, so they feel much more organic. The ML's guilt felt especially visceral and defining for his character, and his core fear.
I also like how the top here enjoys the sex just as much and sorta melts into horny lol, not just the MC. And the MC also seems to have a complex inner life, especially the fact he can't be upfront about his past and has reservations due to fear of rejection. This itself is a very typical dynamic - someone like ML who's very anxious and preoccupied, and the MC who's more reserved and closed off.
Okay yeah, ML' psyche is a textbook anxious attachment and PTSD. That's the first type of controlling, possessive ML in BL that I can empathize with and actually understand where he's coming from cause it's not out of malice, but super deep trauma. Dude really wants to feel wanted and securely attached. I felt so sorry for him when his backstory was shown.
I found the sequence where the ML doubted MC's confession and let his own anxious attachment shine through very well made. It's a very logical reaction according to his trauma and consistent with what he's been through. It's rare to see in BL with messy characters/plots, and it adds real depth to the characters and their reactions to each other. Surprisingly enjoyable read so far. (Pls no more baby talk during sex. Maybe it's also a trauma thing, like ML projecting his stunted growth and lack of childly love onto the MC... Yeah, Ill view it this way)