"You didn't even try to understand me!" So she should have stayed back, getting every single day mistreated in order to understand you?
Is it also her fault you deceived and took advantage of her and created a fake version of yourself for the sake of your revenge?Her fault she didn't see through that as a naive, sheltered person?
Not to mention that he NEVER tried to understand her either, even though in his case he was welcome to, unlike her. He only embraced a distorted version of her that he made up in his head, but i guess for Heiner Annette is as 'heinous' as he sees her, while he is only 'misunderstood'. He deserves understanding while she doesn't.
And i guess he also knows her feelings better than her own self, right?
Trauma is not an excuse for perpetuating harm and suffering, nor a free forgiveness card for causing emotional or physical pain to others. Trauma may help explain why someone is primed to think, feel, behave, or react in certain manners or in certain contexts. But having experienced trauma is by no means a justification for harmful behavior and no amount of trauma exempts a traumatized person from being held accountable if and when they hurt others.
And this is for the people insisting they're both at fault. No, they're not. Yes, Heiner is traumatized and DIDN'T deserve what happened to him and yes, this experience changed him forever and understandably so. But he is STILL an abuser. And no, Annette is not at fault for being born ignorant in a society where women of the higher class were bred to be sold off for marriage. Ignorance and inability to be given an opportunity earlier in order to correct it is NOT her fault. She did not give the orders and she certainly did not wish for anyone to get hurt. There's ZERO indication she knew what was even going on. She was sheltered and controlled her whole life. That's why i find the people, few as they are who find excuses for Heiner to justify him yet criticize the hard work of a person that was bit down by guilt and the hatred of a LOT of people but despite that they rised up and tried to move on, annoying. Heiner's feelings aren't her responsibility.
"You didn't even try to understand me!" So she should have stayed back, getting every single day mistreated in order to understand you?
Is it also her fault you deceived and took advantage of her and created a fake version of yourself for the sake of your revenge?Her fault she didn't see through that as a naive, sheltered person?
Not to mention that he NEVER tried to understand her either, even though in his case he was welcome to, unlike her. He only embraced a distorted version of her that he made up in his head, but i guess for Heiner Annette is as 'heinous' as he sees her, while he is only 'misunderstood'. He deserves understanding while she doesn't.
And i guess he also knows her feelings better than her own self, right?
Trauma is not an excuse for perpetuating harm and suffering, nor a free forgiveness card for causing emotional or physical pain to others. Trauma may help explain why someone is primed to think, feel, behave, or react in certain manners or in certain contexts. But having experienced trauma is by no means a justification for harmful behavior and no amount of trauma exempts a traumatized person from being held accountable if and when they hurt others.
And this is for the people insisting they're both at fault. No, they're not. Yes, Heiner is traumatized and DIDN'T deserve what happened to him and yes, this experience changed him forever and understandably so. But he is STILL an abuser. And no, Annette is not at fault for being born ignorant in a society where women of the higher class were bred to be sold off for marriage. Ignorance and inability to be given an opportunity earlier in order to correct it is NOT her fault. She did not give the orders and she certainly did not wish for anyone to get hurt. There's ZERO indication she knew what was even going on. She was sheltered and controlled her whole life.
That's why i find the people, few as they are who find excuses for Heiner to justify him yet criticize the hard work of a person that was bit down by guilt and the hatred of a LOT of people but despite that they rised up and tried to move on, annoying. Heiner's feelings aren't her responsibility.