Need an opinion on something I'm struggling with.

Mana November 2, 2024 6:22 pm

Now I know I can't ask people online about my sexuality. But I've been questioning for a long time now. Sometimes I feel like I'm faking it. Problem is I'm scared to go on dates with men. I don't have a past of having something horrible happen to me, thank God but I just am scared, not to mention confused as to what do i want. My friends having boyfriends make me jealous. But I'm not jealous of them, i just want something like them. I am repulsed by men. I'm repulsed when I think I have to sleep with a man. I'm 23. I shouldn't be. But I am okay with women(atleast I think so.) I know I'm not gay for women completely because I've had crushes on boys before. I've also thought about whether I could be an ace, but I'm not.
The conflict is whether I'm bisexual or it's just a phase. I've had crushes on women before and I know my type in women and men both. But I just can't tell whether it's a phase or I really am bisexual. Some opinions would be helpful. :(

Responses
    Cruchy_rollers November 2, 2024 6:28 pm

    If you’ve genuinely liked a girl then your bi, but honestly labels don’t really matter, just like who you like, that’s all there really is to it

    Elio November 2, 2024 6:30 pm

    Hmmm... I think you are the type who can only have sexual desires when you are really into someone . It's normal to feel scared when you haven't dated before. Don't rush it . Take it slow . Don't think about sex right now . Just try to get to know someone romantically first men/ woman .

    Mana November 2, 2024 6:35 pm
    Hmmm... I think you are the type who can only have sexual desires when you are really into someone . It's normal to feel scared when you haven't dated before. Don't rush it . Take it slow . Don't think about se... Elio

    I'm not thinking about sex but the men who ive spoken to for a few days have.

    Mana November 2, 2024 6:36 pm
    If you’ve genuinely liked a girl then your bi, but honestly labels don’t really matter, just like who you like, that’s all there really is to it Cruchy_rollers

    That's true but I'm starting to think I'll die alone

    orion November 2, 2024 6:36 pm

    idk what to say (and pardon my english, it's not my first language) except that maybe you could read or search some videos about being bisexual and ace? and if you can't tell that what you're experiencing is a phase or not, maybe you could just take time to explore being bisexual, see if you're confortable with the label and then decide on your own?

    i'm sorry if this isn't helpful but i really don't know what else to say. and just so you know : being repulsed by a man at 23 isn't horrible, like, it can happen. maybe you're attracted romantically to men and not sexually. that is possible, too. but, as i said, maybe look out for videos of people's experience with bisexuality and sex in general, and see if it clicks with you.

    i hope i helped you in any way! i wish you all the best and hope you find answers to your dilemmas/questions. (:

    randomm November 2, 2024 6:36 pm

    im no expert but sexuality isnt something you commit to. it's a spectrum, just because u identify as this thing then change your mind somewhere down the line doesn't mean you faked it, you can actually do that, that's part of finding yourself. as prev repliers said, like who u like and girl u sound like youre pressured into liking men

    Cruchy_rollers November 2, 2024 6:39 pm
    That's true but I'm starting to think I'll die alone Mana

    That’s ok too, I don’t think I’m ever gonna marry anybody, I like being alone

    Elio November 2, 2024 6:40 pm
    I'm not thinking about sex but the men who ive spoken to for a few days have. Mana

    What Σ(  ̄□ ̄||), guys whom you have only met for only few days are talking about sex . That's bad . Just change those men girl . Those types aren't good .

    Just Confused November 2, 2024 6:45 pm

    I dont know how to phrqse this without mass words but

    Youre on the ace spectrum. Eat garluc vread and enjoy life.

    No its not a phase, no youre not faking.

    Heteroromantic ace - the romantic attraction to the opposite sex but not sexual attraction.

    Since you also added in the fact you like women.

    Biromantic greysexual could be a lable you may find fits you. But honestly you dont have to be shoved in a box.

    But just know alot of people have these thoughts i included, im panromantic greyace. Qnd sexual thought about men and women make me feel sick but i can do it and i dont enjoy it, if the conditions are met.