Random frustration

I know this is so random but I just want to let go of my frustration... I'm a fresh graduate and looking for job rn. It's been 3 months since I graduated and I feel left out right but I know I'm doing my best to apply. I just can't find a job related to my course so I decided to apply through BPO job which are really open for newbies and fresh graduates.

Already passed in a company but still finding another company who can offer me better. I just want to find a better company and feel frustrated because my friends have better offer than me in this BPO industry. I really feel anxious rn and adulting is hard. And I really hate myself cuz there is a part of me that felt really unfair and wished that some of my friends don't pass in their interview (I hate myself for this (︶︿︶)＝凸) and want them to feel what I feel. I just hate myself rn cuz I feel insecure. But I know this is not right and wish them well in their interview and helping them rn. But deep inside I kinda don't want to help them cuz I want them to experience what I experience. Where no one help me and how I did not pass a lot of interviews. But that just makes me an asshole that is why I try my best to help her. However a friend keeps asking things that just are too much already and it's like she wants me to spoonfeed her all the information that I know. It's just unfair to me but I still help her cuz we all start at nothing right? I guess it's okay to ask. I just can't ignore her cuz I'm a people pleaser ヽ(`Д´)ﾉ

Anyways that's all. I'm just going to concentrate in my career and stop thinking about this. Continue in life and focus in myself. I'm going to leave this frustration here and not think about it again. I will help my friend with what I have and not be a bad friend. This is just the beginning