Hear me out what if the "insect" in his brain was planted by himself cause he doesn't want...

Hear me out what if the "insect" in his brain was planted by himself cause he doesn't want to remember something that happened to him.

And another one I've been thinking about this since he brought the fact that he takes a medicine Soo what if that pill actually worsen his memory cause as far as I'm seeing he stopped taking it (as far as I remember I have bad memory blame my ADHD) and some fragment of his memory are starting to come back