nvm let me try a little:
Okay, post-university era, Geom definitely trauma bonded REALLY hard to Rieder. I really don’t remember much from this era bc tbh, whenever I try to read this manhwa I just read the 27-35 era on repeat. Anyways, I think the scene around 10-20 where Geom was at the movies with Wooyeon but had “sex”(? It could also be called rape) made his trauma bond very apparent. Anecdotally, when I was stuck with my abuser I also became hyper sexual as a fawn response, as things didn’t feel safe & I wasn’t given affection unless it was sexual, or unless I acted in a cute / provocative way. I think this also happened to Geom in another way, as we see early in his situation he learned that pleasing his rapists made him safer most of the time. He probably learned to associate “seduction” and “sex”(rape) with safety because of that. As well, he was more familiar with being abused, raped and beaten more than wooyeon’s gentleness. Honestly, that scene made my heart drop because it showed just how traumatized Geom was.
Just the sheer volume of what happened to Geom reinforced his fawn response, self objectification, hyper sexuality and trauma bond to a point where it was practically ingrained in him. I don’t think Geom is a naturally seductive or provocative person, but he adapted at a very young age (when he was SA by his dad,) reinforced it (when he exposed himself to older predators,) learned to use it, (university) then it was reinforced once more (incident after his mothers death) & basically might’ve been the only thing that kept him alive throughout his later circumstances.
Anyways, we saw a more healthy version of Geom in university around Wooyeon and Yeonseo, and it was clear that he was actually quite childish & carefree & even funny when he’s in a healthier place. I genuinely don’t think he’s a naturally seductive person, it’s just because of how much that behaviour has been reinforced. Literally every time I’ve seen him “switch”(?) to that state, it was because of external aggression and/or lingering trauma. It also seems like when he senses sexual interest from others, it just “flips” on, since he associates sex with rape, rape with fawning = seduction & hyper sexuality.
Anecdotally, I share similar coping mechanisms with Geom. if I were to project, I’d say Geom bases his self worth heavily on others perception of him, as well as others perception of him IS LITERALLY THE ONLY THING KEEPING HIM ALIVE. He clearly never had a good developmental period in his childhood, and developed & encouraged to be hyper sexual by how he saw older men react to his behaviour. The thing that made him seek out older men in the first place as a youth was likely the incident with his father, and then the subsequent absentee father. As it was LITERALLY HIS DAD who SA’ed him, fatherly love, fatherly figures and sexual desire probably became intertwined in his mind unconsciously, leading him to seek out sexual desire from father figures (older men.) With his fawning response, I already explained it pretty well. On the topic of hyper sexuality, I can expand a little more: the combination of others sexual desire being the only thing keeping him alive, his self worth reliant on others interest, and the association of attraction = sex.
Self-objectification is something that I know some survivors (myself included) do, especially for victims of exploitation(myself included ) do. It’s kind of like intellectualizing, where survivors can (consciously and unconsciously) discern their strengths & weaknesses, how to manipulate relationships between them and their abusers for safety / gain and to a point—completely dissociate from their real self. For me at least, it was an enabler of my exploitation who taught me A LOT of different manipulation & self objectifying techniques. I think that Geom was likely taught, forcefed or just picked up these techniques. Self-objectification is very unhealthy because it’s like you lose touch with yourself & you only know how to act (and feel safe) in an “attractive” and “provocative” way. (It’s not textbook for everyone) which is what we see Geom do all the time past the university era.
Another thing I wanna add: For me at least, while fawning, I feel completely detached and numbed out from my real identity, which is actually an addicting feeling. Fawning as a response is very dangerous because abusers react to it positively and make victims feel good, training them to basically be in the fawn response 24/7. I don’t know if Geom is the same, but if I were to guess, he probably also feels numbed out and detached while being raped + abused. For me, being treated nicely by normal people was 10x more agonizing than being with abusive toxic freaks since I felt like I was going to “destroy” good people. Geom also describes the same feeling I think when he said he didn’t want to involve Wooyeon in this kind of life, which is probably a factor of why it was kinda hard for him to remove himself from Rieder.
Good review and im very sorry for you..
Interesting I always wonder why geom followed reider in the cinema, but again he said that he become addicted of tender sex maybe because he only feel relieve of all violence when reider touched him I dont know...could be the drugs too, anyways he is a complex character he is damaged and he ultimetly doesnt know how to interact with people since he is assuming that everyone wants to be with him to use him somehow that is why he test wooyeon and provoke him just to confirm that he is different.. and of course his trauma runs deep and even if he dont want it his rage and pain for everything that happen to him somehow let it out when he is with him..
And spoiler alert!
Is very interesting that reider was also a victim of abuse but at so much younger age than geom and in a worse way cause he was adopted with other kids just for a sadist pedo that k**ll himself infront of him and I think that he is an example of what geom could have become if it wasnt for wooyeon or soyeon... reider is more damaged than anyone cause he knows that he doesnt have anything so he uses geom as a reflect of him and he cant let Geom be happy and free cause as Geom feels he thinks that its not fair and in his anger he marked wooyeons back to have scars just like him. To torture geom even in his final moments..
Okay wait let me gimme my two(or three) cents about this story(from the authors perspective) & address how explicit the rape scenes are:
1. Authors intention: For me, this story was super traumatic to the point where I physically can’t stomach reading 99% of the visuals in the story. It doesn’t seem seriously romanticized bc of how realistic geom’s trauma responses (fawning, hyper sexuality, trauma bonding) is. As a survivor myself (not TO THIS EXTENT OFC) but I think the author has a pretty good understanding of trauma responses in these situations. I didn’t feel like the rape + situation was glorified at any point, the way it was drawn & written seemed more like emotional gore than anything. I think the Author’s intention definitely was not to romanticize SA and trafficking mainly, but to write a tragedy that involves those themes.
2. Explicit rape scenes: I don’t think this manhwa would’ve been as traumatic to me if there wasn’t these super explicit, graphic and excessive rape scenes. Every single one of these scenes (even just seeing Geom naked) made my stomach drop and made me sick. I didn’t feel… like the rape was romanticized at any point either, I didn’t feel like it was drawn with the intention of arousing the audience. I think it was drawn to break the 4th wall and immerse the readers in the RAPISTS’ view, hence the close ups of specific body parts. Certain scenes of rape seemed to disembody Geom’s body (close up, especially,) from readers’ POV, which possibly is meant to imitate how the rapists view Geom. I have a very vivid memory (unfortunately) of around chapter 30-40(?) where there flashback of Geom getting taken to Rieder’s grand opening club thing happened. The way he was drawn at the end, the way he was positioned didn’t seem romanticized to me. (As a victim this might just me how I see it) it seemed more… artistic and tragic. The way the manhwa was stylized without any bright colours, vividity and life (except in the flashbacks) implies the author’s underlying intention of tragedy, despair and suffering. As well, that drawing of Geom (if I remember correctly, it was just him in the dark without any background) seemed more like HIS OWN VIEW of himself, since there wasn’t a background.
Extra: analysis of Geom (I haven’t read this manhwa properly in a WHILE but I’ll do what I can)
As a teen/young adult: Geom seemed isolated from people his own age. He was assaulted by his dad & his mother divorced his dad, but his mom still blames him. Geom (around middle school-high school) began learning how to appeal to older men for affection and attention, likely something that made him feel safer around older men. This was probably a fawn response + hypersexuality, self objectification + a self esteem reliant on outside influences + isolation from peers.
During university, Geom was quite passive and stopped reaching out to older men, but from a scene around 27-37, we see that he still applies his knowledge on seducing others, though he’s not as proactive with it. Most of the time I’ve seen him “seduce” others, it was when they made him feel unsafe. (around the chapter where he went “I’m a virgin”, I think it was bc some guys were calling him a man whore.) Clearly, Geom has already had a pattern of using fawning and self objectification (using his appeal, appearance and body to feel safe, knowing how to “market” himself as a part of seduction) as a coping mechanism.
I don’t wanna analyze anything past university era bc its still rly difficult for me at this point, but I hope this help people understand the characters and author more (●'◡'●)ﾉ