Glad i ain't the only one who thinks of this i mean it's not like mc experienced an PTSD from the blonde dude that he finna get scared every freaking time, even when he was having s*x with aver for the first time he thinks of the Blondie like he wasn't satisfied with the ml's treatment and wants to be rough...i was stressed at that part that it didn't even felt like i wanna focus on the sex part
OMGG YESS
But he only thought of Jace because that's what he was used to, Jace traumatized him made him believe he would never be loved for who he is, so when he was doing it with Avery and he was gentle it felt too intimate for Eric and he got scared he’d fall for him only to find out he was the same as Jace and he only wanted his body. That’s why he wanted him to be rougher so he wouldn't fall for him
MC grew up in a traumatic and dysfunctional family where violence and maltreatment was the norm. He wouldn't know how a healthy relationship dynamic would work, you could see him being closed off to other people because of this.
This is why he was initially weary of Avery's interest and kindness - since he was manipulated and just used as a busybody aftet trusting the toxic LL previously.
As for not being satisfied with the deed, his point of reference is being maltreated on the act and thought that having s*x should be "rough" opposed to Avery being gentle and loving.
Took him a while to stand up for himself, but MC has changed and developed his ways and life with Avery's love, support and positive demeanour.
Mc sucks, doesn’t deserve avery AT ALL