Actually I take that last part back, according to the novel the asshole meant it in a “shut up or kys” type of way because its implied the FL was trying to make the ML accept her as his empress so he sent the scarf as a warning despite thinking she wouldn’t actually do it. I still don’t think that alone makes him abusive, but it is enough for me to say that this dude needs to grovel and flip 180 and start actually listening to the FL to actually ever hope for a healthy relationship. Though realistically the FL is too traumatized and needs time away from him.
I agree, got nothing to add
I see a lot of you referring to the ML as an abuser and I feel like you guys use the word way too lightly nowadays. The ML didn’t seem to love the FL until it was too late, it was a you never know you love her til you let her go type of case but instead the FL killed herself. He wasn’t abusive in any sense, so he isn’t an abuser. We can call him shallow, ignorant, and an asshole for only finally really caring when the FL takes her life, but we can’t call him an abuser because so far nothing he’s done has been abusive. Just asshole-ish. I’m even go out on a limb here and say that I really don’t think the ML gave the FL the present in a way of telling her to “kill herself”. Honestly I think she misinterpreted it that way.