Responses
People who aren't into the bdsm community themselves shouldn't make stories about it unless they have someone who is, giving them feedback on how to portray it accurately.
i think so too, it’s really not that hard to do some basic research at least if it’s going to be a big plot point in the story ;;
Nah bc this whole last conversation really bugs me. Like wdym you thought he was just acting scared.. he literally acknowledges that he initiated a coercive sexual relationship with mc but also just assumed that the mc was familiar with BDSM and knew the gravity of participating in a dom/sub relationship without it being vocalized explicitly. like mc did not propose this "contract" or whatever so why would he know anything about BDSM? ml says he started practicing BDSM at 23 and he’s in his thirties now, but he definitely does not behave like a dom who’s been playing for almost a DECADE. it’s so wild to me because you’d think a man who has been involved with the BDSM community for so long would have better etiquette. i do not believe that he could not tell that mc has never participated in BDSM play. generally an experienced dom should know that communication is the foundation of a dom/sub relationship and to not talk about limits/rules/kinks/punishments AT ALL is crazyy bro ESPECIALLY with a partner who is entirely new to BDSM WITHOUT A MF SAFEWORD OR REGULAR CHECK INS. i also have a hard time believing a dom who has been once again playing FOR TEN YEARS wouldn’t be able to recognize when a partner is dropping/in distress as it’s pretty obvious. it’s part ignorance too cuz i know im biased as a CSA survivor but as soon as mc showed fear/reluctance i immediately clocked he had sexual trauma and every incident when he was triggered was just so obvious by his behavior and what little he did vocalize like use that noggin of yours dude THINK IM BEGGING YOU THINK A LITTLE DEEPER. i know this isn’t supposed to be an accurate depiction of the BDSM community but like if you're not going to include really anything about real BDSM dynamics why even mention it? like plenty of people engage in light kink play without identifying with or having knowledge of the BDSM community so why not go that route? it’s just weird to me idk i think it’s a strange point in the story, ultimately i know it’s fictional but it still grinds my gears.. anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk ill be here stewing all night